Tiffany - posted on 09/15/2015 ( 4 moms have responded )
My son will be 4 soon, since he was born his father has only been around maybe 5/6 months of his life. We are currently going through a divorce, and he's trying to bully me telling me he will take my son out of state where is he stationed when he feels it's necessary. I'm having an issue with this because up until a week ago he hasn't tried to call, Skype or see our son.
Now he is calling me every day, which I'm fine with I would like our son to know him, but why now? The biggest thing that upsets me is he was the one he said we were not working we haven't been under the same roof in almost 5 years. He kept saying he would get full custody of our son because I worked at Dunkin donuts and I didn't make enough money. Now that I have a good paying stable job he has nothing but negative things to say like I put work before my son which is not the case everything I do is for my baby boy. I didn't work the first two years of his life to spend as much time with him as possible. I bring him to school, birthday parties, Drs apts. I know his allergies (which his father hospitalized him over!!!) which brings me to my next point his father says I don't communicate these things to him I have a log of when I tell him things because he's constantly accusing me of not telling him things.
If you were to ask him today who our sons dr is he wouldn't be able to tell you seeing he's only been to two of his apts his whole life! And when he comes home I'm more then compliant let him spend the night, let him spend as much time as he has time for with our son and all he does is shower him with toys. Then throws it in my face " see he wants to stay with me" of course throw a new toy at a 3 year old every day of course he'll like to stay being a parent is more then buying toys. It's being there when they wake up making breakfast, bathing, bringing to school, doing projects, playing, making dinner, reading before bed time.
All he does is bully me, now calling me 6+ times a day when he knows I'm at work and our sons at day care and when I answer and say hello hes like oh I'm at work what's up like calling me just to say hi. We were together for 10 years the whole time emotional abusing me cheating on me and telling me I'm crazy going to therapy only to find out I was right the whole time. Telling me I'm not a good parent because our son got an ear infection or telling me I need to do this and I need to do that like no your not here I do everything for my son don't tell me what I'm doing wrong when I'm the only one who has been here.
I almost feel like his behavior could be classified as harassment, especially seeing up until a week ago he didn't want nor feel the need to reach out to our son. All we are to him is a pay increase. He complained about the divorce because he wasn't going to get family separation or bah any longer now he says well at least I get to benefit from being a bachelor the rest of my career so I get housing and won't have to live in the barracks. Like really that's all he cares about that's why we got married at 18 your main focus should be our child not getting out of the barracks!
Sorry for the rant I'm just so confused and so stressed out. I don't want him basically a stranger to my son taking him out of state. I'm fine with shared custody when he's home but taking him out of state I don't trust he won't try to keep him!