Can I get sued for not wanting to move out of state with my husband?

Taliana - posted on 01/25/2011 ( 13 moms have responded )

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I am originally from south east asia. never like living in tropical country moved to NYC. married with my husband and then moved to CA. don't mind CA, since it's dessert and lots of beach. 3 years ago moved to TN and now husband decided to relocate all of us me and our two boys to Florida. I visited FL couple of times and never like the state and the humidity so similar to where I originally from. mosquitos always hunted me down and bruised my whole body. just not care to move. and now decided don't want to move to FL. he decided to sell our house and move within 3 months to FL working with his brother. can I stay here in TN? can he sue me for not wanting to move there with him? can he take away my boys and take my right of my children? I am an american citizen before marriage.

please advise.

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[deleted account]

Your husband's a jerk if he makes these decisions without taking any of your feelings on the matter. I wouldn't let him take the children. And I highly agree with the idea of getting a lawyer.

Taliana - posted on 01/06/2013

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God works miracles in many ways.... that is all I could say.
this problems was 2 years ago. we ended up travel every so often
to make his dreams works with his brother happen.
2 months ago his brother died, and now left my husband deep in debts business.
he is ready to sell and return to TN. I tell you prayers will take you places that you never
thought you could!.
don't get me wrong I love my brother in law and never wish anything bad happen to him.
what happen to his health was unexpected and the Lord took him home.
as a matter a fact we start enjoying this Florida travel for this past 2 years.
we love being in TN for summer and winter in FL. but yet we have to give it up.
thank you for all your advice. it is all worth to try and I done all of necessary but
PRAY what survive me and the boys most...

Ellen - posted on 01/06/2013

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I have a different story. My husband and I have been married for 2 years. Dated for 2 years. I have 3 kids from a previous marriage. My husband took a job without my consent 2 states a way. He said that it's the chance of a life time ( double in salary). I love this man with my soul. I have joint custody with my ex and will never allow the girls to move. So I'm staying home and I'm miserable. I've cried for a week. Husbands gone but, says he'll be back when he can. To top it off his son graduates the airforce on our 2 year anniversary and if I don't go I won't get to see him. He doesnt want me to stress him out.

Terri - posted on 01/25/2011

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the most he could do is get full custody - but you would still have visitation rights - meaning you would still get to see them. You don't mention how old the kids are. But if they are old enough to travel alone - generally you have to split the travel costs. If they aren't old enough to travel alone - you might have to drive half way to get them and him drive half way. It can generally be worked out. If you had custody - the same would apply for him. He would have visitation as well. If the children are small enough - sometimes they will live with one parent half the year and the other parent half the year. There are many many custody options - but they can all be worked out.

If you wish to keep your marriage - I would suggest sitting down and having a heart to heart talk with him. Perhaps marriage counselling would work and help him see your side of things and vice versa. You said he wanted to move to work with his brother in Florida. Does he have a job there in Tennessee? Or has he lost his job? If he doesn't have a job - he may see no other option but to move where he has a guaranteed job. Maybe an option would be to keep the house in Tennessee and rent it out to someone. Go to Florida for 6 months or a year and give it a try. If things don't work out - you, your husband and the kids could always try to move back to Tennessee.

I still think a free consult with an attorney will answer a lot of your questions regarding custody and what he can and cannot do. That way he cannot scare you into making a wrong choice. I'm all for saving a marriage if it can be saved. Communication is the key to any good relationship - be it marriage, friendship or family.

[deleted account]

Unless there has been serious abuse.... he can NOT take away your rights to your children. Both of you have equal rights to those kids right now. Meaning that either of you could take off w/ them and it would be the other parent's job to fight to get them back. I agree w/ speaking to a lawyer ASAP. Good luck!

Taliana - posted on 01/25/2011

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I don't care about the house. i just don't want him to sue me and take away my rights to my children.

Taliana - posted on 01/25/2011

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I am positive and hoping no divorce. but I think I need to protect my rights. so seeing a lawyer would be my best step now. I just hope he won't find out and thought that I wanted a divorce. I really want to have this marriage works. I wished he will understand and care enough about my health and skin conditions being in that humid & bugs swarm state.

Bonnie - posted on 01/25/2011

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No, he can't sue you, but you are in this marriage together. You have rights too. If the house is under his name only, he can sell it without your consent.

Terri - posted on 01/25/2011

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Most divorce attorneys will offer a free consultation. I got divorced about a year and a half ago. Mine cost about $2000 which i had to pay up front. However, you can check and see if there is legal aid in your area. Legal aid will help those with little or no income. As far as who would win custody - that's only something a judge or lawyer can advise you on.

Taliana - posted on 01/25/2011

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Thank you ladies... I will call a lawyer tomorrow. about the house under his name, because at the time I had such a bad credit from school loan and other debts. so i was so afraid that we won't get approved for the loan. anyway I don't mind selling it. and I can easily find another place to live. it just that i am so afraid of being sued of not going along with his plan.....
I am currently not working, I mean in the past I always just have part time jobs. do you all know how much lawyer will cost me at this point? so far he doesn't mention about divorce. but he mention about the right to bring his kids and such. and I agree I can come visit once in a while but I am afraid to do that now. thank you again!

Laura - posted on 01/25/2011

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I am a little confused, how can he sell your house without your consent(is it just under his name)? And that is pretty crappy to just decide to move without making the decision with his wife. Sounds like he doesn't respect you very much to do that. I can't give you any legal advice but I do wish you all the luck in the world.

Terri - posted on 01/25/2011

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He cannot sue you. He can sue for full custody, joint custody or partial custody of the children. You have the same right to sue for full, joint or partial custody as well. The children would have a right to see both parents providing there is no abuse. I agree with Katherine - you should consult a lawyer regarding custody issues if you do not wish to move with him to Florida

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