catching up as daughter grows

Patiencethembelihle - posted on 06/18/2016 ( 7 moms have responded )

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i am not sure if am catching up with my daughters growth and needs. i still see a toddler in her and not sure if am adjusting in her needs as she grows. by the ways she is turning 10 in a months time

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Patiencethembelihle - posted on 06/20/2016

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Nadine Currie thank you so much this has been helpful and uve given me insight coz i jus realized am not even sure what interests my daughter as an individual maybe its my own insecurities and trying to hold on to her in a way. but i get what you mean and will put to practice. i just know she loves to be model and that's a dream of hers when she was still around 4 not sure if that has changed with growth. guess i need to learn that at some point she will grow and be her own person

Nadine - posted on 06/20/2016

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I have always talked to my babies as people, so it has just been a gradual adjustment for me. Talk to your 10 year old they way you would any other person, keeping in mind that you are guiding them through to be a responsible adult. When you watch television together, ask their opinions. Find out what they like to do. Interact with them in what interests them. At 10 my kids discussed anything from the evolution of superheroes to the value of euthanasia in society. Kids are bright, and have brilliant insight into very complicated issues in the world. My youngest is now 16, and is about the most socially aware human being I know, full stop. And I believe a great part of that is because we also spoke, and allowed my son a voice to speak about issues and never undervalued his intelligence and opinions, even when they differed from ours.

Patiencethembelihle - posted on 06/20/2016

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for me she is the only child and i always wonder how u treat a 10yr old coz every time i see i stl see the little gal she was at maybe 2 yrs if u understand. i feel the way i converse with her hasnt changed and nt sure excatly wat mummies talk about with their 10year olds. u mention independence am scared might be a bit in a her space without realizing

Nadine - posted on 06/20/2016

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In what way are you treating her like a toddler? And if you recognize the ways that you are, can you not adjust that behavior deliberately until it becomes habit? Usually our kids give us the cues when they are ready to become more independent step-by-step. Sometimes we need to give them that gentle push. By ten they should be quite independent. It may be time to see a counselor.

Patiencethembelihle - posted on 06/20/2016

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i still treat her like a toddler coz for me she still feels like one. dont knw wat changes to make

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/18/2016

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Seriously, you are treating your 10 YO like a 2 YO?

Dove - posted on 06/18/2016

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There is a big difference between a toddler and a 10 year old... HUGE. Granted, sometimes preteens do behave like overgrown toddlers, but if you are still treating her like she is a toddler you are likely to have a lot of issues in the very near future.

What exactly are your concerns?

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