Child after an affair

Zuly - posted on 10/21/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My daughter just turned 1 and her father has never met her. Knows about her and calls and asks how she is doing but never offered to help. He is married but they are getting a divorce now for other reasons he has 3 kids from the marriage. I know what I did was wrong and I don't need an lectures. I've asked for forgiveness. My daughter is a blessing and I lover her to death. Can I file for child support. He is going through a divorce right now. And what's going to happen to his other kids. I want him to be in her life.

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Raye - posted on 10/21/2015

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Child support and visitation are two different things.

Yes, you can always file for child support. If he makes enough money that the judge feels he should be paying something, then the judge will grant the support. Since he's getting divorced, he will probably have to pay for his other three kids as well, which means you're most likely to get pennies, if anything. But you can still try.

No, you cannot force him to be in your daughter's life if he chooses not to be. You can go to court and get a formal visitation agreement that says when he is allowed to see his daughter, but then it will totally be up to him to follow through.

Have you moved on? Are you hoping to rekindle a relationship with this man now that he's getting a divorce? If that's what you're thinking, then stop. Don't use your child as bait to try to trap him into a relationship. If you want to co-parent with him, then great. But keep the relationship strictly about the child.

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