Child custody question.

Julie - posted on 02/22/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )




New here, and need some advice. My ex (never married) and I had a son almost 10 years ago. Never really had any court ordered child support, custody etc because we were able to agree on what we wanted to do and pretty much did everything 60/40 (me the 60%). Well, I got a new job recently, and the drive to work is killing me and my husband financially. We need to move about 35 miles away from my son's dad. Told him this, and he says noway Jose. He's not letting us move and our son is staying in the same school district. He's threatening court, and I am terrified! I cannot be without my son for 5 days straight! I don't have tons of money for an attorney either. I had no idea it would come to this.


Jodi - posted on 02/22/2013




I am not sure where you live, but in Australia, a decision about a child's education is actually 50/50, so your ex totally has the right to object. From what I understand, there are many states in the US that have similar laws.

Given you have a 60/40 arrangement, this is pretty much joint custody and will be considered byt the court as the status quo. Essentially, what you are suggesting is that YOU get more rights than your ex, and the fact is, you are asking that HE not see his child for 5 days. Of course he doesn't agree with that. Do you think he likes the idea any more than you do? I don't blame him for wanting to object. And yes, he could very well file to put a stop to it, and he MIGHT win based on what the current arrangements have been for 10 years.

I would suggest that his refusal to allow moving school districts has a lot to do with him losing his 40%.

No-one here could tell you how this will go. It really could go either way. One of you has to win, and one has to lose.

I am not sure how you can find a compromise. Can you move only half of that (i.e. 15-20 miles) so that you are a little closer to work (so a little less cost), but that your son's father is still reasonably close to him. He might then agree to a change in school district.

Or is his father's objection that you live in a good school district right now, and he isn't impressed with the other school district?

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