Child Fears Parents Death

Mary - posted on 06/26/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

9

0

0

My youngest son who is 10 has recently been afraid (break down crying afraid) of me or my husband dying. We have tried to reassure him that we will probably be around for many years, but that if something were to happen that he would have lot's of family that loved him and would take good care of him. I have also told him our beliefs that there is a Heaven and we will always no matter if he can see us or not we will always be taking care of him. He out of the blue just starts crying about this probably 3 to 5 times a week for the past couple of months. Do I just keep reassuring him or should I take him to talk with someone professionally. I don't want to be ignoring something that could be pretty serious. He normally is not a very emotional child so that is way it worries me even more. Thanks Everyone.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

User - posted on 05/26/2013

14

0

1

Our 4 year old on the way home tonight started crying..momma I love you to the moon and stars and back please momma don't die! What Ella? Mommy please don't die! please Lord allow me to complete your will for me,and her!

Diane - posted on 04/09/2013

1

0

0

I just found this post because my 11 year old son is experiencing the same thing. Yesterday he clung to me all day, saying he couldn't stop thinking about the possibility of me dying. I let him talk, reassured him that I was healthy and took care of myself, and he had to give his fears to God. I hope it's just a passing phase. Have to admit I'm kind of flattered, but worried about his pain and state of mind. I'll just monitor the situation and keep an open line of communication with him. Thanks for posting your thoughts.

User - posted on 06/26/2009

1

0

1

Mary, I think you should probably talk to someone. I think many children have this fear, but don't usually cry about it like he is 3-5 times a week. Also, sometimes hearing the same thing from someone else other than mom or dad makes a bigger impact. He sounds really anxious about this! Hope this helps!

Stacey - posted on 06/27/2009

32

11

7

Hi Mary,





About three months ago my son saw someone jump in front of a subway train he was on with his father. They were in the first car and the person's head hit my son's window beside him. My son saw the hole thing happen. He was very scared and didn't understand why this person did this to himself. I spoke with someone in the hospital and they told me to answer any questions my son had about death and be very open about it. From age 9 to 12 kids are more aware of death and that someone close to them or themselves could die. This is very normal at this age for kids to have concerns and questions about death and be an emotional. My son sometimes as well breaks down and cries out of the blue. I sit with him and letl him cry and talk about his feelings. I always ensure them death is a part of life but to enjoy life.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

6 Comments

View replies by

Deidre - posted on 06/26/2009

452

52

77

*hugs* I can definitely imagine how hard that is. Since I was a young child I've had 'nightmares' of my loved ones dying. When I was younger it was my mom or my dad or my brother dying, I would always start thinking about it before going to sleep (which would in turn make it harder for me to sleep). I'm not sure if I ever spoke with my parents about it but I learned to cope. I still think like that a lot and it makes me cry but it's just the way I am, a huge worrier (and I married a navy guy, go figure hehe). Definitely talking with someone should help.

Just want you to know that it is normal to have these thoughts (even constantly, I had them almost daily for years and years) and it is something that he should be able to learn to cope with. I'm not sure what underlying issue could cause this but if there isn't any, and he's just now learning your mortality, than he should be able to learn to cope (and he may need help learning how to do that from a professional, which is okay).

Sending more hugs to your son!

Mary - posted on 06/26/2009

9

0

0

You need to come back to Kansas. You are so good. I am leaning to that. I just want to make sure there isn't more issues in this then we are seeing. And I don't know where it came from other than if it is finally coming to a head from his great uncle's death over a year ago.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms