Child Support

Gloria - posted on 09/07/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




Im 32 i have 4 kids. 14yr old son & 12 yr old daughter from a previous relationship. I have been with my husband for 11 yrs married for 7 we have 2 boys together 5 & 3. I've always had majority of custody of my 2 older kids he had 14% & i've had 84%. He has never been consistent with child support i would get $14-$100 randomly for about a month then stop for a year, he is over 75K in debt for child support. I have never been a nagging baby's mama i would ask him for help at times but he would never come through. So earlier this year my older son wanted to move with his father who lives in another state. I was very hard for to let him go. But i came to realize I was raised by my father and remember wanting my mom so bad, i know there is alot of things i missed out on by not having my biological mother and so I didn't want my son to resent me. So allowed him to move with him. His father has 2 other children with a new girl. She loves my kids and is good to them. Thats all i can ask for i understand that she is like his mother while my son is over there. While my son lived with me he had never had to call his dad and ask for anything we always provided everything he needed. Now that my son is over there I send him money when i can. Lately i haven't been able to. In may I went to see him graduate 8th gr. and i took him out since i wasnt there for his birthday i took him out shopping, he asked if i can help him pay for an ipod i chipped in $150 and bought him some shorts & hats. His bike was stolen so in August I bought him a $500 bike. So since i haven't sent him any money he thinks that Im done with him and that i don't care for him. He only calls me when he wants money and he always brings up "when was the last time you sent me money Mom!" He is just rotten to me. I always tell him i don't want to argue w/you about money. "I love you" Mind you his father never sends our daughter any money or does my daughter ever have to call her Dad for anything. AM i wrong should i be sending him money regularly? help me please he makes me feel horrible.


Dove - posted on 09/07/2012




Your son is guilt tripping you about money? Or his father is guilt tripping you about support? Do you send child support to his father? I know the father sucks in the money department, but sending him support (no clue how much is reasonable) is the right and legal thing to do if your son is living with his father.... just make sure you have documents of how much and when you send it. If your SON then calls you asking for money.... let him know that you send money for him to his father. You will give your son gifts/money for birthdays, etc... but if he needs/wants money at other times he needs to go to his dad for it. That is the way it goes when you live with one parent and not the other.

You have no reason to be sending your son money regularly unless it's something you WANT to do. You should, however, be sending his father the child support that he wasn't man enough to send you.

Buying that boy a $500 bike just because his got stolen and he's already griping again about money? What an ungrateful kid. Don't let him guilt trip you into spoiling him rotten. If he wants some money he can go out and mow some lawns or something. 14 is plenty old enough to start doing a little work for money.

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