Children left unattended in the car

Clare - posted on 08/23/2012 ( 81 moms have responded )

32

9

1

My husband was recently at the supermarket and he said he walked past a car in the parking area that had two children left alone in it - one a baby and the other a toddler, both asleep with the windows open. He was concerned but didn't do anything. If it was me, I would have phoned the police. I consider that to be child abandonment - apart from the distress the children would feel if they awoke and didn't know where their parents were, and the fact that it was a hot day which can be really dangerous even with the windows open, they were also vulnerable to being abducted. Do you think I'm over-reacting to want to phone the police and does anyone leave their children in the car when they go in the supermarket?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Amanda - posted on 08/24/2012

1,677

13

310

It depends on the situation. If she was just taking her tolley back after shopping it's totally different to doing her shopping and leaving the kids in the car.



I do leave the kids in the car to fill up with petrol and pay, take my shopping trolley back, go to the ATM or get bread from an open fronted street stall, but only if I can park directly outside the front and am in constant view of the car. Most of the time can still hear the kids. If I cant park directly outside I take the kids with me.

[deleted account]

I think there are several factors to consider. How long, was a hot day, were the doors locked, and did the children look distressed?



I know there are a lot of vigilantes. There are right and wrong ways to react to such a situation, but because personally I have left my children in the car (locked, windows slightly ajar, only on cool days, to run a 1-2 minute errand) I know that if I saw someone else's kids in the car I'd give them the benefit of the doubt and hope that they would be back in a jiffy. I would stick around until I saw a parent unlock their car, and go. If it's a substantial amount of time, then that's a whole different issue. I wouldn't judge the parent, but be an extra set of eyes for them.



But seriously. For all the people who are slagging on us who do sometimes take convenience over safety I just have a couple things to say. Never ever on a HOT day. I get that. But in terms of abduction? Do you realize how rare abductions by strangers are (abductions by relatives, caregivers, exes... etc are by far the most common type of abduction)? Driving has a higher mortality rate. So if you are going to judge me for willingly putting my children's lives in danger (in fear of an abduction), you should all sell your vans and take the bus. Cause that's actually the safest thing, and although inconvenient, you are keeping your kids out of harms way.



Also, we should stop taking kids to the park. Cause I've seen too many parents on their phones, or talking to other parents not keeping an eye on their children. I would argue that my kids who are strapped in a locked car for 2 minutes are actually safer than the social parent who's not paying 100% of their attention helicoptering their kids on the playground.



Don't be judging. And don't jump to conclusions and try to be a vigilante and call the police. You could actually be taking resources away from an ACTUAL emergency to attend to your 911 because of your assumptions. Assess the situation first before making judgement calls.

Tori - posted on 08/23/2012

2

39

0

I have one son and 3 step daughters and would never leave them in the car there are so many bad things that could happen in a matter of seconds. I'd call the police

Cynthia - posted on 08/25/2012

84

10

4

All i can do is pray for those who truly believe that living in a small town nothing can happen...does anyone even know how the Amber alert came about?? Small town they knew everyone in the neighborhood that the mo

felt comfortable letting her kids ride their bikes around the whole neighborhood, when Amber was abducted yes a neighbor witnessed it but he was old freaked out n had a heart attack...or how about Megans law??? A neighbor abducted her from

her own house ...so its not demographics its common sense and safety...so you can all fight bout calling cops..knocking people out or being attacked by dogs i will still call the cops...it just trips me out that people really think the safety of children is no ones business..God Bless You....

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/24/2012

13,207

21

2014

I think the other thing that needs to be considered (as usual) is geographic location.



Obviously, you are more at risk in, say, LA, than you are in, say, Wyoming.



Like Sherri, I never lock my doors at home. Heck, we even leave the door open at night in the summer, so dogs have full access. I never HAVE locked my doors, not in 20+ years that I've been married, and we've had kids for 18 of those years. (Correction...I do lock the house if we're all out of town for more than 8 hours)



I do lock my car at work, but I work at a University, and there are those delinquents (usually from high crime areas originally) that get a thrill out of burglarizing cars. But our local Wyoming kids? No threat. In the driveway, the keys are in it, unless we're out of town, in which case it's locked.



So, suffice it to say, small children with less developed cognitive skills shouldn't be left if:

1) it is too hot

2) you will be absent for more than 5 minutes

3) you are in a high crime area



But, people should use common sense in making the decision to involve the cops/cps!



And, no offense meant here, but...a "mandated reporter"...Even the WikiP definition sure made it sound like "busybody who's gotten someone to give them a sliver of authority". That sure sounds like a snitch for CPS to me...Just my opinion on that.



My reaction to a "mandated reporter" calling me in for ANYTHING would be to take that person to court myself and sue for anything I could get, because you not only traumatized my kids by your lack of understanding about a specific situation, but you also jeopardized my opportunity to raise my children by "reporting" on a situation that (again) you do not fully understand.



I just thank (whichever entities you choose to thank) that I'm living in the area that I am, that I have the ability to make my OWN parenting decisions without interference. And, I give credit to those same entities that my kids are responsible, well rounded young men who haven't been exposed to some of these types of opinions that are being voiced here.



Sherri, girl, I'm all with you on this one!



ETA: Now, if the child is in obvious distress, overheating, seizing, or you OBSERVE PERSONALLY that the parent has been absent longer than 5 minutes, that's different. I'd call that in too.

81 Comments

View replies by

Julia - posted on 09/29/2015

16

0

3

call 911 why is that so hard? just do it. what happens after that is none of your business. your business is to save those kids from death from lack of air or kidnapping by a psycho

Dana - posted on 08/12/2013

9

24

1

i would have done the same... i bring my son in the house when he wont put a hat on to play on the garden. i WOULD NEVER think of leaving him in the car no matter the weather if he was asleep

Alexandra - posted on 09/22/2012

581

24

1

You are not over-reacting and your husband could get in serious trouble too. He could be charged as children-neglect. If somebody saw this, saw he didn't do anything about it, they could have called the police and report the entire incident.

Dove - posted on 08/27/2012

11,620

0

1348

There is also a world of difference between waiting around to make sure they are safe.... and saying that anyone who leaves their child in the car for any amount of time and for any reason shouldn't have kids. I know YOU didn't say that, but many of the responders did have that response or one very similar. ;)

Clare - posted on 08/27/2012

32

9

1

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. Just wanted to clarify that I am not "judging" anyone; I know no-one is perfect, my only concern was for the safety of the children. My husband now realises he didn't do the right thing and should have waited around to make sure they were safe - so we fully accept that we are not perfect. But to say "my children, my business; your children, your business" is really like asking us all to turn a blind eye to all sorts of neglect and abuse. We all have a duty of care to protect and help those who are vulnerable in society, in whatever circumstances. If it were my children left alone in a car, I would thank the person who put themselves out to ensure their safety.

Bekah - posted on 08/27/2012

106

40

14

In most states leaving a child in the car unattended/where you cannot see them is ILLEGAL end of story. @Shelly - You are very right that mom/dad/caregiver can see the child even if you cannot. If you are unsure if someone is around there is nothing wrong with waiting and seeing as long as you can tell the child is in No danger. If I were to approach the car and no one comes running then that answers that question really fast.



Being a mandated reporter doesn't mean I cannot be sued but it does mean that you won't win. Anyone can be sued for anything - I could bring a suit against someone because I don't like their shoes but it would be a total waste of money for me because I would lose. In a lawsuit if I dial 911 because I can see your kids but you cannot I have the NHTSA "National Highway and Traffic Safety Administration" to back me - There recommendations is if you ever see a child in a car unattended to immediately dial 911!!!

Here in Michigan if a child is under the age of 6 and they are left unattended (unattended being defined as being left alone) it is a jail sentence of up to 90 days. Other states have similar laws.



So for those that use an ATM - you are still in sight of your car still attending to child.

Returning a shopping cart- Still usually within sight and attending to child.

Gas station - depending on the station could be considered in sight of car and still attending to child.

For those that go into a grocery store - Seriously?!?! There is no grocery store I know of where you can keep your eye on your vehicle while you go get a gallon of milk and then checkout -- I am not saying those grocery stores do not exist because they may but I have never seen one.



http://www.ggweather.com/heat/index.htm

http://www.safercar.gov/parents/heatstro...

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/27/2012

13,207

21

2014

Dove is exactly right. Just because we HEAR about more "scary" things now doesn't mean that they didn't happen 20-30 years ago, just that we were not immediately informed through various forms of technology.



And those of you judging those of us who HAVE done this, or don't see a problem, probably need to closely examine your actions, and when you find out that you, too, have made questionable decisions... Oh, wait, I forgot, you're all perfect, of course, so you can hold your noses so high as to judge the rest of us.



I'm speaking from almost 20 years experience as a parent, BTW, it's not like I had kids yesterday. The fact of the matter is, stranger abduction is actually more rare than you'd care to admit. It is generally someone who KNOWS the child/family that snags a kid and takes off.



AND, the more paranoid you are of a "possible" event, the more LIKELY it is to occur.

Dove - posted on 08/27/2012

11,620

0

1348

The times we now live in? Life isn't any scarier now that it was 20-30+ years ago. You just hear about it more on the news now.

Alice - posted on 08/27/2012

2

0

0

@Shelly, Because of the times we now live in, there is NO excuse for leaving a child(ren) unattended. A baby and toddler????? Please.......... NO Excuse.

Alice - posted on 08/27/2012

2

0

0

You are NOT over-reacting. I would have done the same thing. In addition to notifying a police officer, store manager or guard, I would have gotten the license plate number and contacted child protective services.

Sylvia - posted on 08/27/2012

1,315

8

34

Also: What Shelly said.



And what Shawnn said about how when you see a child (or a pet) *actually in obvious distress*, it's a totally different story and you should do something immediately.

Sylvia - posted on 08/27/2012

1,315

8

34

@Cynthia, I totally sympathize with your daughter -- I don't think a kid should be left alone in the car (or anywhere) against her will, when it scares her, and I think that was kind of mean of her stepmum to do :( But at the same time, I'm sorry, but I do think it's a bit unusual for a 7-year-old to be terrified of being alone for a few minutes. (You still haven't said how long it was; 10 minutes is a lot different from an hour or more!) I'm also curious, at what age *will* you consider it appropriate for her to do things and go places independently?



Kids don't always understand things the way we think they do. I remember when my DD was in maybe SK or Grade 1, the school had an assembly where they talked about ... I'm not exactly sure, actually, but the message DD took away from it was that she should be really worried about people being "taken". When I picked her up at school that day, she was very upset because -- I swear I am not making this up! -- she had been worrying all day that some random stranger would kidnap me on my way to collect her, and no one would know what had happened to me, and then what would happen to her?? Now, I'm 100% sure that this is not the message the assembly was intended to convey ... but that's what DD understood from it. So we had a long talk about how EXTREMELY RARE it is for people, including kids, to be randomly kidnapped by random strangers, and how Mummy and/or Daddy would ALWAYS ALWAYS come to collect her as necessary or make sure someone else did, and how it's good to be thoughtful and careful but not so good to be scared of everyone you don't know. And since then I've tried to be really careful about checking that what I say is actually what DD hears :P

Shelly - posted on 08/27/2012

61

0

0

I'd say, don't jump to conclusions too fast. Just because you can't see the parent, doesn't mean the parent can't see the kids. I've run in to a bank machine, leaving the kids in the car. I could see the car at all times, and they were in less danger than they would be if I had to take two small kids through a parking lot. Not to mention, how exactly is one to operate an ATM while holding a baby and hanging on to a toddler. I mean, you need at least one hand free!



Yes, there are genuine cases of child neglect and abandonment, and yes, sometimes it is appropriate to intervene. But give a parent the benefit of the doubt and wait five minutes. There are some legitimate reasons to leaving a child in the car for a short time, and many people have given good examples. Those of you that disagree, please don't judge other parents, and their views. Just because you would do differently, doesn't mean the other person is a bad parent.

Maria - posted on 08/26/2012

3

0

0

Seriously people? Why on Earth would you leave your kids alone in the car at the supermarket. When you have kids you don't get to leave them behind because it is easier on you...it is called parenting people. Wow.

[deleted account]

I would contact a manager in the supermarket before the police.



I've left my sleeping children in the car to run in the house and get something. If it is going to take me more time than going in grabbing something and leaving, I stay with them. There is no way anyone from the street could see into the car. So I'm not worried about them being abducted.



At the same time, I've had to leave my children in the car when I've gone to the ATM. The credit union we do business with only has ATMs around town no actual building or branch. I never go unless I can park right in front of it. In that case I could have the option of letting my toddler stand outside next to me with the baby in the other arm, where the toddler is more likely to get abducted or hit by a car, or I can have them safe in a locked car.

Juliannemarie - posted on 08/25/2012

130

0

56

I would have called the police, hundreds of children DIE in america from hyperthermia, because of being left in cars on hot days.

Musicteach40 - posted on 08/25/2012

11

24

1

I would have called!...and even if it meant me to go to court to testify...I'd still do it! In a heart beat!

Angela - posted on 08/25/2012

8

0

0

This I have never done but knowing my personality...no...I would not have called the police. I probably would have stood their until the mother/father/guardian came back and let them know I was uncomfortable leaving them their alone. Since I don't know the situation...maybe another child could have been having a crisis...could be a good mother who made a bad decision and needs to be told about it. Not sure I would turn their lives upside down. I am more likely to just do my part and help her/him out by standing their. But that's just me.



Sometimes as people we find it easy to just call the authorities and let them handle it. Too hard to rearrange our busy (sometimes not so busy) schedules to help another. People forget we are all in this world together and it takes a village. Sorry if I offended anyone.

Sara - posted on 08/25/2012

1

2

0

Saw this scenario at the college a few days ago. The mother was obviously quite young, and the child remained asleep the entire time...Once she realized her child was locked in car, she DID NOT hesitate to get help, which resulted in Fire Dept response. It still took quite some time to remedy situation, and people clapped for them all when the doors were opened and she got to hold the small child;)

Stifler's - posted on 08/24/2012

15,141

154

604

No way. Into the service station I do but I am gone 2 minutes I'm not off shopping.

Sherri - posted on 08/24/2012

9,593

15

391

@Cynthia I am not saying I would knock you out but I am saying if you are on my property and you are looking in the windows of my car in which you couldn't see in unless you walked onto my property them we are going to have an issue and you can bet I will be injuring anyone who dare do so. More likely than not I would simply let my dog out and he would take care of the problem of anyone not allowed on my property in about 10secs flat.



It is no different than allowing my kids to play outside in the yard at 4 or 5yrs old by themselves. I allow that also all the time. I don't live in LA nor would I ever for the simple fact I love the secluded atmosphere where I live. Also unless you live on our dead end street which has only 5 houses on it, nobody usually is on it and any car draws our attention immediately.

Jessica - posted on 08/24/2012

1

0

0

I would have definitely called the police! How many stories have you seen where a child died because of being left in a car and the parents/guardians forgot about them? And to the person who replied about suing a mandated reporter for calling in to the police/CPS, I am fairly certain that Mandated Reporters cannot be sued for doing their duty and calling it in.

Minet - posted on 08/24/2012

35

19

1

There is no reason to leave young kids in the car. The alternative is death or abduction. You never think it will happen to you until it does. My daughter was a newborn and my son was almost 3. I came home and got my son out of the car and forgot my daughter (simply because I wasn't used to getting two out of the car, and she was quietly sleeping). When I walked in the house, my husband asked where she was. Thank God it was less than a minute and I was parked in the shade but I was harder on myself for making the mistake. My husband tried to tell me it was an honest mistake but that incident has been etched in my mind ever since. I could never forgive myself if anything had happened. What if my husband hadn't been home? How long would she have been in the car? I shudder to think... My kids are 9 and 6 now and they still come with me every time I leave the car.

Heidi - posted on 08/24/2012

1

0

0

I never left my children in the car by themselves to run into the supermarket, who would do this. If you did not want to bring them or you have to bring them then you be a responsible parent and take them in the store with you.

[deleted account]

i would never leave my toddlers in the car alone. even when i was grown up my bother and i would be left in the car when we were like 8 and 10, but my mum always took our 2yr old sister.

Sue - posted on 08/24/2012

4

2

0

You are not over reacting at all. I agree with you, even if it wasn't that hot in the car, I could never leave a child in a position that they could easily be abducted. I would say that this should be child endangerment.

Kelina - posted on 08/24/2012

2,018

9

235

I think you need to know the whole story. I don't leave my kids in the van often but it's happened. Dragging four sleeping(so I'd have had to wake them up and drag them cranky kids across the parking lot) just so I could return an article of baby clothes while my van was in full view? yup not happening. They were fine. Pulling my kids out of the van because I forgot my keys/diapers/something else upstairs? not happening. if it's a hot day, I'll usually forgo my errands if my kids fall asleep in the van and I don't have my hubby with me, but I'm fine leaving my kids in the vehicle for a minute or two. The chances someone is going to manage to get all three of my kids out of the vehicle without someone noticing because on of them is pitching a fit? 0. Hell, the chance of them getting even one of my kids out of the vehicle without my daughter screaming bloody murder is 0. Course when you see the video of a staged kidnap and the little girl screaming you're not my dad and no one doing anything, that's not exactly reassuring but considering where I live, I'm not overly worried.

Ashley - posted on 08/24/2012

149

22

4

I go to the gas station everyday and I leave my kids in the car. Im in and out in less than a min. Doing an actual shopping trip, no. And I always take my keys out and lock the doors.

Bekah - posted on 08/24/2012

106

40

14

Ericka - I know what you mean - I have called the police - twice before - just on a dog

Erika - posted on 08/24/2012

2

16

0

I almost called the police when I saw a DOG left in a hot car the other day...I would DEFINITELY call the police if I saw this. The kids/car could be stolen, rear-ended...too many things that could happen in a moment's notice. Definitely call.

Dove - posted on 08/24/2012

11,620

0

1348

Whether or not I've ever left my kids in the car (that is no one's business, so I'm not stating specifics).... I haven't once ever locked my car (on purpose, that is... couple of times by accident) OR taken my keys out of it in the 18 years that I've had a license. 'Could' something happen? Sure... anything is possible, but the chance of anything happening where I live is so incredibly remote that my children (and my vehicle) are not in danger from any 'predators' here. The only car 'thefts' where I live are teenagers out for a joy ride and if a teenager is that desperate for a joy ride that they'd steal a dirty, dented minivan... have at it. lol

Kkrjrpleggett - posted on 08/24/2012

236

33

3

NEVER, NEVER, NEVER LEAVE A BABY ALONE IN A CAR!!!!I I agree with you, I would have called the police, and not left that car until they arrived! End of story!

Cynthia - posted on 08/24/2012

84

10

4

Silvia...no she didnt want to be left alone she knows i wouldnt that and it dosnt matter what excuse it is..no keys or alarm or ill b back in 5..i dont leave my kids in the car..i teach my kids to be cautious not scared and as far as judgement from other parents thats between God and me if im not guiding or protecting my children or others then im sure there will b consequenses...@ sheri...please u trying to knock me out is real funny and ill take the chances of u calling the cops for trespassing kids shouldnt be left in cars alone...glad that u live in a place where u csn leave your kids alone doors unlocked...we live in L.A. where everyone knows you just dont do that and we lock our doors but ive learned that u can live in a big city or small town where everyone knows each other..you still dont gamble with kids safety..and for you to threaten me seems like ur to close minded to see that...

Abir - posted on 08/24/2012

1

3

0

I would leave them if I was buying milk from the corner shop or dropping a rx to the pharmacy because car would always be in site. Not do a full shop!

Raychel - posted on 08/24/2012

5

25

0

I'll leave my kids (3.5 & 6 weeks) in the car if I'm running in to return movies, pay for gas, or something that will take less than 5 minutes. I crack the windows, lock the doors, and keep the car in my sight. If I think it will be longer than 5 minutes or I can't see the car, I'll take them in. sometimes when we get home they'll both be asleep, so I'll unload the groceries our whatever before I take them out. And if they're both sleeping, I can only take out one at a time anyways. If my daughter is awake and I need to leave the car with her in it for any reason, I explain to her where I'm going, what I'm doing, and how long it will take. Then, since the car will be in my sight anyways, we have a game where we make silly faces at each other, so she's never scared. I had someone freak out on me the other day, cuz I loaded the kids first, then the groceries, then put away the cart. I politely thanked them for their concern, then told them that next time they should ask what's up before they flip out, cuz I was only returning the cart.



I say if you see a car with unattended kids, take the plate#, make and model, them watch it and give the parent a few minutes. If they're not back within 5 minutes tops (since that's the law), go ahead and call. But if they do come out and get mad, be an adult. Don't just assume they're bad parents. Say you were concerned, you're happy they're back now, and leave it at that. I think we do have a responsibility to other children in out community, but they're not your kids, & other people have different parenting styles. If any unsafe issues have been addressed, move on. Don't assume you know that patent or their situation.

Sherri - posted on 08/24/2012

9,593

15

391

@Cynthia if you can see my kids in my driveway then you are trespassing and you can bet your ass I will have you arrested for trespassing on private property when you have zero business on my property looking in my cars in the first place!!! Actually you will lucky if you aren't knocked out first and then I will call the police and have you arrested.



I have a zero violent crime rate here and only a 1% non violent crime rate I do not worry in the least it is safe. No different leaving them to play in my yard unsupervised at 4 then it is to leave them in the car to finish a nap. We don't lock our house, we don't lock our cars and at night we even leave our keys in our cars and I leave my purse on the front seat of my car w/my kids in the ignition during the day. So I don't every worry about leaving my kids to finish a nap in the car.



Most people even leave their cars running to run into the convenient store or the coffee shop. I have never locked my car even at the grocery store.



I have never taken my now 6yr old or 6mo old out of the car to run into the convenient store or pay for gas. He gladly sits in his car seat and has never been afraid I don't lock it either but I take the keys in with me. I can see the car at all times and am gone for a minute usually under that.

Bekah - posted on 08/24/2012

106

40

14

Because I am a mandated reporter it becomes my business legally. It is not my choice to become involved or not. Due to my profession I have not only a moral obligation but a LEGAL one to the community. If I see a child in this situation I could lose my license if I didn't report it and something happened. I could also be held criminally liable if something happened and I did nothing.

It isn't my job to decide whether what you are doing is legal or not or whatever. That is the legal system and the courts job. My job is to ensure the safety of the community at large, including, and especially the children!.

Bottom line, if I report it and nothing comes of it, no skin off anyones back. If I DON't report it and a child is injured or dies, lots of skin off lots of backs!!!

Sylvia - posted on 08/24/2012

1,315

8

34

Cynthia, I'm curious: why was your 7-year-old so scared? I often stayed in the car with a book during "boring" errands when I was around that age, and I don't remember ever being even mildly concerned (I mean, I had a BOOK). What did she think was going to happen? Did her stepmom *make* her stay in the car when she didn't want to (why?), or did she maybe not tell her approximately when she would be back? Or was she left for hours and hours? Or was it one of those cars where once the engine is off you can't unlock the doors, and she wanted to get out and go find her stepmom but couldn't? I hope it's not because you've been filling her head with invented terrors like "there are predators lurking everywhere you go, just waiting to snatch you if Mommy takes her eyes off you for one second" ... because that's a scary way to grow up :(



Yes, parenthood absolutely does come with inconveniences. A ton of them. But it doesn't *have* to come with the self-imposed inconvenience of believing you can never leave your kids alone *anywhere* for even *one second* because SOMETHING TERRIBLE WILL HAPPEN. That just isn't true. One should always use common sense -- you don't let your toddler loose in the parking lot, and you don't let your six-year-old play with chainsaws, and you make your ten-year-old call when she's going to a friend's house instead of coming straight home from school. But you can't live your whole life in constant fear of everything -- it's exhausting and depressing, and it leads you to judge other parents when some totally unpredictable random bad thing happens to their child, instead of empathizing with them :(



Sherri, I kind of semi-disagree with "my children, my business" -- I mean, I hate busybodying and unsolicited parenting advice as much as the next person, but I also feel like a caring community is a real help in raising kids. One of the reasons I feel safe letting DD roam our neighbourhood is that I know lots of people know her and would help her out if she fell and hurt herself or something.

Cynthia - posted on 08/24/2012

84

10

4

Wow im trippin on alot of these answers...NO its never ok to leave any child in the car at anytime whether its your driveway or not..it is my business even if its ur property..i have 4 kids sometimes cranky havnt slept all night...still my driveway or not its not ok if rather wakevup my cranky kids than take a chance at some predator taking his one minuete window to try n take my child..seems like alitbof selfishness for those moms who think ur letting ur kids rest its more of a rest for you...as a mom id like to rest too buy not at my kids expense...my 7 yr old was left in the car by herself while her stepmom went into the market, she was scared and itvtook everything inside me to not rip her hair off..i wouldnt do it not even for a minuete..it may be a hassle to take a bunch of kids in the store but im sure all u moms wanted your kids so deal with the inconveniences...for those who think its no ones business well its not ur business then if i call the cops or say something to you cuz i will !!!!

Teresa - posted on 08/24/2012

1

6

0

Not over reacting at all but you need to give the parents the benefit of doubt. Maybe they ran in for one item and it just wasn't worth waking the kids up for. I would watch a couple of minutes and then act if needed.I personally would never leave a baby but I have left my two kids alone to run in to the store for a minute but I could always see the car and I left the remote start running so the temperature stayed nice but no keys were left in it.

Sherri - posted on 08/24/2012

9,593

15

391

I would have been irate at you too and would have told you to not let the door hit you where the good lord split you when you turned around to walk away. My children my business, your children your business.

Nicole - posted on 08/24/2012

10

12

0

I've only come across this twice and I confronted the parents both times. In one the 'mom said she didn't think she'd be gone so long' and the other the Dad got irate and told me to mind my own business. Children are my business. As well as other defenseless creatures. I know neither of these parents would have ever forgiven themselves if something had happened to their kids. I figure I'm doing them a favor.

Dove - posted on 08/24/2012

11,620

0

1348

When I said that a call should've been made that was one of my first thoughts (but not the first). Some of the people making comments on this post are WAY over the top though. Calling the police when the car is in it's own driveway?! Oh yeah, I would've gone off on you too. ;)

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/24/2012

13,207

21

2014

Not only would I have called someone in for tresspassing on my property, I'd probably have met them with my revolver in hand, were they approaching my vehicle, on my property, where my kids were sleeping.



Dawn, you have no idea what that mother's circumstances were, and you criticize HER for freaking out on YOU for trespassing on HER property?



Many's the time that I've seen parents leave kiddos sleeping in the car when they get home. Mostly its due to one of the following:



1) the kid has been ill, and hasn't slept nights, so you're desparate to not only let them sleep when they finally DO, but also to get a bit of respite from a trying situation



2) the kid has not slept well (for whatever reason), so the same situation as #1



3) it's easier to get groceries, etc, carried in if you aren't juggling kiddo at the same time, and kiddo will be upset if you wake them, so you carry in first, and perhaps even stash the perishables before you go back out to try to move the kid without disturbing him.



4) you have a special needs child that you must take in first, get settled and situated, and needs seen to before you go out and get the others.



I agree with Sylvia...if you think it's always safer to wrangle two cranky little ones, either across a parking lot or into the house on your own property, then you've obviously never done it.

Sherri - posted on 08/24/2012

9,593

15

391

@Sylvia I agree since the husband didn't seem concerned and never stayed long enough to even know how long they were in the car it seems like a lot of judgments before we know all the facts. Mom/Dad could have simply been returning the cart or talking with someone but was in eye sight of the car etc.

Sherri - posted on 08/24/2012

9,593

15

391

I have left my kids sleeping in the car in my driveway a lot especially if it was a nice fall or spring day. It is not against the law here and if anyone called the police and was on my property #1 I would press charges for trespassing and then I would tell them to mind their own bleeping business.

Sylvia - posted on 08/24/2012

1,315

8

34

I think we need more information. How long were the kids left alone? How hot was it? If it was only a few minutes, and the weather wasn't extreme, I honestly don't see the harm. You may think a car with two little kids in it is a tempting target, but not a lot of car thieves would agree with you. Also, if you think it's safer to wrangle two cranky little kids across a supermarket parking lot for a 5-minute errand, then clearly you have never actually had to wrangle two cranky little kids across a supermarket parking lot :P



Now, if the kids were actually left alone for a long period, or if the weather was hot and the windows were shut, then that's a whole other story, obviously.



My kid was never left alone in the car at that age, but that's mostly because there were always 2 parents in the car (I don't drive) -- so if she was asleep, one of us would just stay with her. We haven't had a car since she was 4, so it doesn't really arise now, but I would be fine with leaving an older kid in the car for a while, maturity level permitting.



Dawn, I am utterly baffled by your story. The car was sitting in someone's driveway, and instead of knocking on their front door to see what was up you CALLED THE POLICE?! Seriously?

Melissa - posted on 08/24/2012

17

21

0

I do not live that close to a grocery store, so it does take longer than a few minutes. Especially if there are lines.



The only time my kids are left in the car and an adult is not with them (or within sight):



1. forgot something and need to run back in the house - and I RUN to get it done fast. If I need to spend more than a few minutes, I unload them.

2. can't think of any other reason



No one said those of you who made tough calls (cold, medical condition post is the one I am thinking about primarily), but in general, it is a VERY bad idea and can be life threatening. And in many places, it's illegal.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms