CIO last resort and I'm losing my mind

[deleted account] ( 44 moms have responded )

My son is 10 months old. He has never been a good sleeper. He doesn't nap well and usually won't sleep longer than 30 min unless someone is next to him (for his nap). I started CIO and this is my 5th night. I've weaned him from his nighttime bottle (which he never really needed it was easier for us to put him to sleep this way) but he is still waking up in the middle of the night. This is night 5 and I am about to lose it! Why won't this kid sleep?!?!
We used to co sleep but that wasn't any better. He has given me so many black eyes and fat lips I've lost count. He is a thrasher and even in our bed he woke up often. Rocking him, patting his back, singing, talking to him, sometimes even the bottle wouldn't do the trick...which is why I've resorted to CIO.
First night he woke up after 5 hrs of sleep and cried for an hour. Second night woke up after 5 hours and cried 45 min. 3rd night same thing, 10 min. 4th night he woke up 4 times each time he cried about 10-20 min. Tonight, this is his second wake up )it's 2:30 am) and he's been crying for 20 min but I KNOW if I pick him up or put him in bed with me I will be miserable AND I still might not be able to get him back to sleep.
Why won't this kid sleep?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Stephanie - posted on 07/27/2011

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You sound like you are doing a good job. It can be sooo exhausting. No one has mentioned dietary issues. At his age, he really needs naps during the day too, and it would actually help his nighttime sleep too. I' wondering if there could be something in his diet that may be affecting him, since he can't sleep during the day too. You may want to minimize sugars/juices and such and definitely chocolate (I know some babies are eating it from 6 months on). They can use up the magnesium in our bodies. Something that could help, but you would probably want to ask your doctor about is Baby Calm. It is a magnesium supplement, very relaxing for them. My babies sleep much better when I take the mother version-- Mama Calm (I breastfeed so they get it in the milk). I can tell the difference when I run out of it. Also, just to encourage you, it will get better :)

Katherine - posted on 07/27/2011

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CIO is commonly misinterpreted. It does NOT mean let your child cry for 45 minutes. It means Let them cry for 5, go in and comfort them, cry for 10, two nights later go in and comfort them. Your son is very stressed out right now. He has had his bottle taken away and now he has been left to cry for long periods of time.

http://www.babycenter.com/0_baby-sleep-t...

I disagree with the CIO the way you are doing it. The bottle, meh. You could have done it differemtly but that's not a MAJOR issues.

If you think about it, how would you feel? He needs your comfort and TRUST me I know how frustrating it can be. My 2yo still doesn't sleep through the night. In fact even my 5.5 yo still wakes up.
Try the link I gave you. If you are going to do CIO do it the right way :)
Also they are growing at a rapid rate at that age, I found that sometimes my kids were hungry too.
Don't worry though, this is not uncommon.

Amie - posted on 07/28/2011

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I haven't had the time to read all of the posts so I may be repeating someone else...but, I had horrible sleepers! My first son didn't sleep through the night until he was 4 years old! My second son was almost 2. And my 3rd child (who was adopted at 10 mos - so we thought would have to be a good sleeper because she'd been in an orphanage all her life) didn't sleep through the night until she was 18 months old. I think you do whatever works! I was so exhausted after 3 sleepless children that my husband and I did whatever we could to get an extra moment of sleep. Sometimes that meant co-sleeping, sleeping on the floor next to the crib, holding them and rocking for hours on end, driving them in the car, etc. We did whatever we could. This was an area of parenting that I wasn't prepared for - my friends had kids who slept through the night by week 3. No one ever warned me it could be so hard to get a baby to sleep at night or for nap! Keep trying and eventually your baby will sleep - all three of my children are great sleepers as elementary and high school aged kids. It just was a long few years of sleep deprivation. The quote I always hold on to is: "The days and nights are long...but the years are short!"

Hayley - posted on 07/28/2011

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Hi there, it seems a lot if people on here seem to be quick to have an opinion without ever being in your position. My daughter (now 14) was a terrible sleeper, waking at least 6 times a night then ready to be up at 5.30. With the advice of our health visitor we tried CIO n to be honest it was hell, she became increasingly emotionally distraught every night and I dreaded bed time. I did persevere for several months but didnt see any results, so at 10 months decided I would rather have less sleep myself with her waking me but know she felt more emotionally secure. She didn't learn to sleep thro the night til she was 3.5 but that was just how she was. I have 2 other children, 8 n 10 months n they r all different. My 8 yr old slept thro from weeks old but my 3rd seems to be a combination of the others... Good sleeper as young baby n now waking every couple of hrs but he can sometimes self soothe. What I am trying to say to you is that CIO works for some babies but if you have an emotionally needy child like my daughter (she still is!) maybe it's not the answer for you especially if it stresses you out. All children learn to self soothe at some point, some just take longer. Go with YOUR instinct. Hope it all works out for you x x

Heather - posted on 07/27/2011

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Have you tried a cosleeper? http://www.armsreach.com/ This was the single best investment (for sleeping arrangements) that we purchased. It attaches flush against the side of your bed and allows you to sleep side by side with your babe without actual bedsharing. Our LO was a high needs baby and a terrible sleeper. While the cosleeper didn't help her sleep better it did allow me to comfort her without leaving my own bed. I could simply roll over and bring her next to me until she fell back asleep and then just lie her back down in the cosleeper. Being able to stay in bed made it easier for me to doze back off and that made all the difference between a totally exhausted mommy the next day and a tired, but ok mommy. Also, because she was so close, her pre-waking whimpering would wake me up and I could sometimes comfort her back down before she actually woke up.

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Danielle - posted on 08/08/2011

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I know it's an old wives tale but have you ever had him flipped I took my son to a sleep clinic the doctor flipped him and showed me new techniques with my son, he was assesed and it was called a 24 hour kid syndrom, after the 2 weeks working with the sleep clinic, my son will sleep for 12 hours at night and a 1.5 nap at 2pm. no matter where i am, they also teach you to disrubt their sleep once a week so if there is ever and emergency, they'll adjust better rather then freak out the whole time.

Kelly - posted on 08/05/2011

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My 20mth old still wakes up most nights. I don't go to him immediately. But I wait a minute. Usually he finds the dummy himself and goes back to sleep. Sometimes he doesn't though. And sometimes my only option is to pull him into bed with me. I don't know how to help, except that you are not the onlly one with a baby who doesn't sleep brilliantly. I wake to every little noise my son makes, even if his breathing changes. Also, sleep when he sleeps, even if it is only 20mins during the day, it does help. I still do this. :)

Kate - posted on 08/01/2011

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Hi Jocelyn, it's sounds like you're going through what my husband and I went through. We always agreed that we would never let our son cry, that we would always go in to him every time he woke up. Then, when he was ten months old, we'd hit our breaking point. I was exhausted, my husband was exhausted, our son was exhausted and he had changed from a sweet, easy-going baby to Mr. Cranky-pants all the time and NOBODY was sleeping!! I'm not sure about the details of CIO, and I know a lot of people absolutely refuse to let their child cry, because of guilt issues, trust me I had those guilt issues and I always thought that parents who could let their child cry ALONE were terrible people! But then.......I tried it......and it worked! I waited until my husband was working the night shift because I knew he would be able to handle the crying, and really it only took the one day and night to see an improvement. I should also say though, that it wasn't just letting him cry, it was also a drastic change in his sleep schedule. Your son is desperate for sleep, he is probably so overtired, that he can't put himself to sleep. I know that sounds like a contradiction, you'd think that if he was tired, he should sleep. We used to try to keep our son up later, thinking that he would sleep if he was more tired!! Crazy! TRY THIS! When your son gets up in the morning, maybe 6-7 am, put him down for a nap at 9 am for 1 hour, then again at 1 pm. Keep him active and busy when he's awake. THEN....I know this sounds like the crazy part, put him to bed at 5:30 pm!! 5:30! I'm not kidding! We did one day of this! I did the whole 10-15 minute bedtime routine for bot of his naps and bedtime and then I left him ALONE! He cried for 20 minutes at his first nap, 11 minutes at his second nap, and 5 minutes at bedtime at 5:30 pm and then, like magic, he slept through the night until 7 am!!! Our son is 2 now, he mostly sleeps through the night (teeth, colds, etc, wake him) in a big boy bed, he has a two hour nap in the afternoon and 10-12 hours at night. He was still going to bed at 6:30 right up until June! I don't feel guilty for letting him cry, because now we are all rested, happy people, our son included and can function properly and think clearly! We are expecting our second baby in 6 weeks and I don't think I'll wait until 10 months again to do sleep training. Hope this helps! Remember, you are a good mother and you are trying so hard to do what's best for your family! You will get through this!

Lara - posted on 07/29/2011

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First of all, ignore the criticism. We're NOT here to judge, for Heaven's sake! Yes, it WAS time, for the bedtime bottle, to go; my son gave it up, @ 9 mos., on his own, and his Dr. said, "GOOD. Otherwise, I'd have suggested it." So, you're doing the right thing, there.



As for CIO, no, I'm sure you're not leaving him in there, screaming his little head off, for hours @ a time, but I know, all too well, that it FEELS like that, sometimes, and I sympathize, believe me. BTDT! I don't recommend a fan, nightlight, or some other source of distraction, because they'll only become dependent upon it. My 37 yr. old husband can't sleep w/o his fan. I don't want that for my son, because, if you think about it, you're not going to be able to pack a box fan, or a white noise machine, for every single overnight trip, that the child takes, in his lifetime!



I'll be honest; it was trial & error, for us, because my husband, the one who SUGGESTED the Ferber method (check on him after 1 min., then 5 min., then 10, or whatever it was), is the one who broke protocol, and put us back to square one, lol. My son was a little older than yours (12 mos., when we started), but, every child is different. Sooner or later, we had NO choice, but to just let him CRY, because, w/ my son, in particular, if you go in once, you go in 85x, and every time we went in, he was even more unruly, for an even longer period of time, than the last!



I think it took about a week, before he finally got the hang, of his head hitting the pillow, before his eyes shut, and being OK w/ us walking away. Generally, from that point on, there was a physiological reason, if he woke, DURING the night (sick, teething, etc.), which is understandable, unpreventable, and just part of the deal, lol.



I've never read "The No-Cry Sleep Solution," but I wouldn't discount it. It might be just the thing. Good luck, & Sweet Dreams!!

Pretty - posted on 07/29/2011

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may you should take him for a general check,sometimes babies dont have sleep due to some internal problems that we may not know as parents but will always complain that they cant sleep. Just like a friend of mine,her baby was crying most of the time&could sleep because she had a problem with her umbrical cord.But none had ever noticed though they kept complaining about her poor sleeping habits.

Diane - posted on 07/29/2011

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Honestly, I can't believe all these children are waking up at 5 or 5:30 am!! We always kept our little ones up until 9 or 10 because dad worked late. They would be tired and sleep until 9 am or later every day. That was great for Mom. They also stopped napping at 3.

My kids never got up that early, and still don't. Now we have to be in bed early for school the next day and they still could sleep until 10 in the morning if they could. Amazing!

Jackie - posted on 07/29/2011

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I know it's frustrating, Jocelyn! It's so hard to listen to your little ones cry. He's just mad and he is allowed to be mad. The thing is he is probably frustrated because he is learning how to fall asleep all over again (without the bottle) Hang in there. He will learn;) Mommies guilt is a horrible thing, but good sleeping habits are as important as a healthy diet.

Meghan - posted on 07/29/2011

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First of all the whole Dr Sears thing is ridiculous. My sister-in-law tried to guilt me with it and I went back online and found other articles where he had written in favor of the cio method. A little silly if you ask me. Not to mention her kids have the worst sleeping habits now. Hang in there. My first son was the same way cause I had waited so long to start the process as you have. I know it probably feels like there is no end in sight right now but there is. The air mattress idea is a good one. I can assure you that it will not last forever and I learned my lesson and started earlier working on my other kids sleeping habits. Before you know it your baby will be starting school and you will wonder where the time has gone. There is an end to even this hard time.

Sherri - posted on 07/28/2011

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First of all, I am sooooo sorry you are going through this! Here are some suggestions that worked great for me & others I know. Read the book babywise. It focuses on keeping baby on a SCHEDULE which is extremely important, as they are new and can't learn to do that on their own. It helps their bodies & minds settle down when it is time. Also, keep him on a regular nap schedule despite him only sleeping 30 minutes. I could set a time to my sons naps; 20 minutes every time...it drove me crazy!! But, he started sleeping through the night at only 9 weeks because I kept him on a regular schedule. Next, make sure he has a full tummy every time he eats and don't let him "snack", whether on baby food or the breast. It helps their metabolism work right and makes the whole schedule thing flow better too. Fortunately I have never had to do the whole CIO because it sounds horribly emotional & frustrating. But I think if you can start working on a schedule & good, regular, full feedings, it might make a difference, but you'll need to be patient! Good luck to you!!

Janelle - posted on 07/28/2011

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my son did the same thing until i gave him a pillow. sounds silly but i think he was just not comfortable with just the mattress.

Amanda - posted on 07/28/2011

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I can understand how frustrating this must be. I had 2 girls who were great sleepers but when I had my son, who is now 16 months, he was a totally different creature. I am so sorry for some of the discouraging and mean posts to your question. I do not think by any means that you are withholding any love from your baby and doing him any harm. Just trying to find a solution to a dilemma. My husband and I are doing the same thing now with different circumstances. I wish lots of patience and well wishes for you and baby. We did some co-sleeping with him, which didnt work well for us either. We have a white noise machine with a projector also, which helps but doesnt solve the problem. Thankfully, my son sleeps through the night finally most of the time, but it took almost a year or a little longer before that occurred. I think I gave him middle of the night feedings too long as well. My son still wakes up on occassion in the middle of the night, and at this point we try to calm him with laying him back down, shushing him quietly, and rubbing his back. It doesnt always work and his crib is in our room. I wish I had some great words of wisdom to make it quicker and easier on you and the baby, but unfortunately I don't. Just know your not alone, a lot of us are dealing with similar frustrations. I wish you TONS of luck and keep your head up! IT WILL GET BETTER!

DeAnne - posted on 07/28/2011

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Ohh and warm baths before bed would help sometimes.. other times it would hyper him up! Good luck and dont listen to all the nasty comments out there.

DeAnne - posted on 07/28/2011

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My son was and still is a horrible sleeper. I feel your pain. I think with Zach it was more that he got scared/fear cause I was not there when he woke up. Maybe it was because we co-slept? Who knows.. I also think he was having nightmares that woke him up as well. What I did was a put a blow up mattress in his room and I slept in his room. He would wake up see me and go back to sleep or I would give him a bottle in his crib! OMG did ya hear that? Wait until my bashing begins right? I gave my son formula in his crib so he would go back to sleep..Guess what? He would go back to sleep and I would get some sleep too. Are you ready for my next blunder as a parent so I'm sure I will get bashed for this too? I didnt take him off of his bottle until he was over 2yrs old.. O thats right moms out there he was over 2! He has good teeth, He's a happy well adjusted boy. My point with all of this.. Is you just have keep trying different things no matter what people say. You have no idea the looks I would get because of the bottle in the crib. But it helped sooth him back to sleep. My presence in the room I think helped too. I eventually got back out of the room and in my own bed but it took time and if I was getting sleep and so was my son? I could care less what people thought. I got sleep! Another thing I did is I wouldnt put Zach down until 9 or 10 at night. I would do everything I could think of to wear him out. Sometimes when he would wake up he would just want to play.. So to let my then husband sleep I would get up and we would play for an half hour to an hour and I would try again to get him down. That helped sometimes.. other times I would be up for a few hours during the night. He is now almost 3 and he sleeps 8-10 hours. OHH I almost forgot.. His afternoon nap I would cut it short. Just some thoughts for you.. suggestions that I have is, try giving him the bottle again, if the milk thing bugs you give him water., white noise is great in a room, night lights are great too. Zach did better with more light in his room. Sleep in his room to see if that helps, cut his last nap short or cut it out.. Get his ears checked... you never know, hope something works for you as I know how hard it is when they dont sleep. Zach finally started sleeping more than 5 hours at a time when he was 9 to 10 months old. If he can roll over on his own he can sleep on his tummy.. Still worried about sids.. get that monitor they have out for sids.. cant remember the name but not hard to find. I would also put Zach in the car and drive around until he feel asleep.. then I drove for another 10 mins or so before getting him out of his car seat. If your son is still in the infant car seat.. heck just leave him in it. I did.. I feel another bashing coming on.. Good luck I hope something starts working for you!

Jac Lyn - posted on 07/28/2011

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So why are you making yourself and your baby miserable? My children did not take naps either ok maybe a 20 minute nap through the day. You need to calm yourself down he can pick up on your vibes...so whats the problem with you holding your child and calming him down your his mother this is what he is looking for. They are only young once and you need to cherish every minute of every second even if you are a zombie every day!!!! good luck and trust me there are other more important things to worry about then hearing your child cry it out.

Lykke - posted on 07/28/2011

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oh boy that is soooo hard. I have twin boys and they were both colicy so I had to "teach" them how to sleep once they got through that. I could never just let them cry it out my heart and my mind just couldn't do it, so i read a million and one versions of CIO and made my own version that I could "live with". For naps during the day, it could be a battle but one would be in the swing while i tucked the other one in, and so on and so forth, i would rock, swing what ever worked to get them on a schedule. After I had a scedule down for them and they were used to it, then I simply sat i a comfy chair between their crips so they could see me and sang a lullaby put on their sound machine and the twilight turtle and that was it, for day time LOL!!! Nighttime was a bit different they would drink their milk in a sippy cup then i would brush their teeth, kisses cuddles lullaby and then i would leave then room. Some nights I would sit in there reading until they fell asleep, but during the CIO I would actually prepare to sleep in their room so that I had a chance to rest too. All i had to do was gently tell them it's ok mommy is right here, they would look down at me then go back to sleep. I did it "my own way" and I also started putting them to bed earlier, and it really worked, I have several friends who went through the same, a few I have "talked through it" on text messages LOL and it worked for them too. I would soothe, rub their back sing what ever works for you, but stay firm in the fact that they stayed in their cribs, I think the fact that i was in the room helped a lot.

Diane - posted on 07/28/2011

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Hi, there. This is a tough one. I know allot of what I do is shocking to some parents, but my philosophy is to do whatever works for you to survive. That is different for everyone.

Neither of my kids liked to go to sleep and didn't sleep through the night until they were much older than yours maybe 3.5. There was always something to wake them and I was constantly getting up and going in to their room so I started co-sleeping at a very early age. My husband works allot and I was on my own, but when my son was 19 months when my daughter was born, I just couldn't be bothered to run back and forth between the bassinett in our room and my son's room all night. The three of us ended up in our bed and we've been co-sleeping ever since. My daughter might have even slept in that crib a total of 10 times. They are now 6 and 4.5 and between Dad and I, we co-sleep. Sometimes there have been 4 of us in one bed until some are asleep and then we move to another bed. There is never any consistancy, but there is always room for everyone and I am comforted knowing that my kids are comfortable and content. It can be very scary for little ones to be left alone in the dark to fall asleep. I have been kicked, punched, punted off the bed, and peed on, but a much happier sleeper in general and wouldn't have missed out on all the snuggling for anything.

I also tried the checking every few minutes and reassurring him, but couldn't stand leaving them to cry for even a couple minutes. It was much more rewarding to sit with them in the rocking chair until they fell asleep, then to bed whenever possible. They still woke during the night and found it easier to be with them than to jump up and have to go to another room.

I just wanted to tell you to keep on trying! Don't worry about what everyone else is doing and "what you should be doing". Do what works for you.

I know this seems like forever, but really it isn't that long until they will be out of our arms. Good Luck.



OH, I forgot to mention that when my son was about 2.5, he started having night terrors. If you know what this is, you know that they just sit up like they are awake and scream and cry. They are actually still sleeping and if you touch them or try to console them, they think you are the "nightmare" and it will make things worse. We have a Q size bed in his room since day one and it made it much easier to be with him. I was always worried that he would hurt himself. Me - I can take a little beating for a few years for the comfort of my kids.

Kids equal TOTAL SACRIFICE. The books and the neighbors don't always have the solution. Keep trying things that make you comfortable and keep him happy, too. That's what it's really all about.

Julie - posted on 07/28/2011

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I have a child just like yours...argh! She's 2 1/2 now, and her sleeping through the night is hit-and-miss. I didn't like CIO, because it didn't work for her. She never stopped crying, she even made herself sick, it was /awful/. :( Everyone kept giving me "advice", which was basically that I was doing something wrong. After trying everything, I finally saw a pediatrician who said "You're not doing anything wrong. Some babies sleep, some don't. You have one who doesn't. Just do what works for you, eventually she will start sleeping, it'll just take longer." Honestly, that was a watershed moment for me. I stopped trying to get her to do anything, stopped fighting and just kept trying little things here and there and eventually we got there. I can put her down in her bed now, leave, and she'll go to sleep (unless she's sick, in which case she asks me to lay down with her until she drops off to sleep, then I creep out). The Fussy Baby Book by Dr Sears helped too, it basically carried the same message with different tips (specific changes in diet, bedtime routine tips, etc.).

If you don't feel comfortable cosleeping, don't do it. It worked for me, but it doesn't for everyone. Some kids get overstimulated by the contact. I guess what I'm trying to say is: don't drive yourself nuts, there's nothing wrong with you as a mom, there's nothing wrong with your son. He just might not be the type to accept sleeping through quite yet. There may be some trick that will get you by, don't be afraid to try different things (obviously within reason, and within your comfort levels). This, too, shall pass!

Laura - posted on 07/27/2011

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Sorry, one more thing...since they do have growth spurts, which may affect sleep - read up on when those are, then you will know if he needs that extra bottle at night (or maybe an extra feeding during the day so night is not an issue)....ok, I'm done!

Laura - posted on 07/27/2011

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You are not with-holding love...that is crap. It sounds like each night is getting better and better (slowly). Just let him know you are there for him at night (by him being able to "see" you only). Of course you wouldn't do that if he were sick or something, sick babies always get extra-special attention. Like I said, just love on him a lot while he's awake, (which I'm sure you do anyway)...and then he will learn that awake time is time together, bed is time for sleep. Just remember, this is temporary, they all learn eventually....

Eleanor - posted on 07/27/2011

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I have 3 children and they all had different sleep patterns and different ways to get to sleep. Child # 1 put to bed and don't touch or go near. Child #2 woke up all the time until after 1 year old- found out had allergy issues. Clear allergies slept good. Child #3 a fan helps her sleep so does heart beat bear. Occasional wakes up at night.

September - posted on 07/27/2011

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Our 2.5 year old son went through a phase of not sleeping well when he was about 2 that lasted for at least 2 months. I tried everything and then found that sitting with him until he fell asleep did the trick. If he woke in the middle of the night I would go into his room and just sit there until he fell back asleep. I think if was comforting for him to know I was close. Maybe give that a try and good luck!

Candice - posted on 07/27/2011

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My daughter did that right up until my son was born. CIO wouldn't have worked for her because she would just get madder and madder. You should read The No-Cry Sleep Solution. It worked like a charm and she was sleeping through the night without interruptions within two weeks.

Amy - posted on 07/27/2011

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did his night time routine change at all, or is it pretty much still the same minus bottle?

Amy - posted on 07/27/2011

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i also rocked mine - heavy kiddos and all - until they were a year old. Was worth my time to snuggle them and have them be asleep in ten minutes rather then them cry for who knows how long.

Katie - posted on 07/27/2011

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Please read the tips it's not all about bed-sharing, It gives tips for those that feel more comfortable with a crib as well. Take what works, leave what doesn't. Not all babies are the same. Leaving your child alone while they are crying is withholding your love from them - at least that's how it feels to the. Of course you are not doing that intentionally and that's not how you look at it or you wouldn't do it. The no cry sleep solution is also a really helpful for more traditional folk.

Amy - posted on 07/27/2011

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Mine didn't sleep through the night like what you're thinking until he was 15 months old.



Really if he's up a lot -what teeth does he have or could he be getting more. When they're in pain from teething, the do just want held. Heck, when I hurt, I want held too.



my kids still needed something at night for self soothing at that age. Until about 18 months I gave them a sippy cup with water. If they woke up, I handed them that and they put selves back to sleep. We never did bottles with son -wouldn't take them. but he didn't have a problem giving htem up either [the cups]. I don't think a baby under a year old should be left to cry. They usually only cry under a year old if they are uncomfortable [cold/hot etc], hungry, sleepy, or in pain.

[deleted account]

I know my son better than anyone and I don't appreciate your response. I posted on here for HELPFUL feedback, not to get bashed by a stranger! Clearly if you had read the thread you would know that he doesn't do any BETTER sleeping with me! It has proven to be dangerous for him and it is safer for him to be in his crib!

Katie - posted on 07/27/2011

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Not worth the psychological damage! Clearly he is not ready for this. Teething, growth spurt are common culprits for wakefulness not to mention being scared and confused about what you are doing to him by with-holding your love at night. Try this link for lots of ideas for getting a peaceful night sleep,http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-b...

[deleted account]

I do have a sound machine. I also have one of those sea horses in the crib that lights up and plays music when touched. That is his cue to sleep and he seems to like it and understand what it means.

[deleted account]

Thanks for the tip. I've tried that and it seems to enrage him when he gets put down again. He is also a big boy so picking him up constantly is physically difficult and more exhaustive. I have found that keeping him in the crib is the best thing for both of us. He gets extremely upset when he is picked up and put back down. I've read every book, tried every method and actually, CIO has had the best results so far. He is a funny child because when he wakes up finally in the morning (usually at 5AM) he isn't hungry he is all smiles and laughing and ready to play and roll around with me.

Laura - posted on 07/27/2011

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Also, I haven't read everything everyone has posted, but do you have a fan or sound machine in the room? I'm sure you do, my first was a difficult sleeper and they are ALL different. I do hope you have help though...you need sleep. And he should be napping in the afternoon - so make sure the room is dark and sound machine on...remember, you can pick up and cuddle briefly, but then he goes right back down. then cuddle lots when he is awake...This is what I did with my second, and he is such a loving little guy and sleeps better than my first!

Laura - posted on 07/27/2011

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I would highly recommend reading BabyWise... and Good Night Sleep Tight by Kim West. The best thing that worked for me is (I could not do the cry it out)...but I would let him cry for a few minutes, pick him up and cuddle BRIEFLY....and lay him back down. And then I kept doing that...it worked, I think it helps them learn you are still there, but not going to hold them the whole time. But when he is awake, cuddle, play and rock all you want...I hope this helps :)

Jolene - posted on 07/27/2011

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You are doing just fine. My only question is why are you the only one doing this? If there is another parent he or she needs to be doing this too and giving you a break. Good luck. It will pay off but habits are HARD to break with babies.

[deleted account]

Hold on kathrine collins, you misread my post. I am NOT letting my son cry alone for 45 min. I am doing CIO the right way. I go in after 5 minutes, then ten..etc.. I soothe him! I sing to him I rub his back...I AM NOT LEAVING HIM ALONE!!!!



He isn't hungry, I can tell by his cry. He is frustrated just like I am. He is also strong willed (like me) and wants to be put to sleep. I did him no favors waiting this long to help establish confidence in himself that he doesn't need me to help him sleep ALL THE TIME.



I have checked with his Dr. multiple times and there is no medical issue. She in fact told me I needed to cut the night time feeding at 6 months, which I didn't.

Hestia - posted on 07/27/2011

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My two sons were similar in their sleep patterns, although perhaps not as intense as you decsribe it. Both always seemed to want to push against the headboard with their head (as if they were still in the birth canal?). My first son is now 8 and last year he was finally 'diagnosed' with SPD = Sensory Processing Disorder. Look it up. This means in his case that he is looking for physical boundaries, and he seems most at ease in his bed when I gently press him down or massage (squeeze or 'hammer') or stretch or pull his body, when he lies in his bed. Sleeping in a hammock worked for him too. There are baby hammocks for sale, just look for Amby Hammocks, and they reportedly help many kids stay asleep as well. Not cheap but they seem to re-sell on E-bay for close to the new price. Perhaps try to mimick that sensation of being wrapped and tight first, by rolling up beach towels and placing them on either side so baby is steady. I cut up a memory foam mattress pad to fit in my son's crib. some warn against sleeping on tummy in that case (because the faom could suffocate) but my kids always slept with their heads well turned so I let them. Good luck.

Kimberly - posted on 07/27/2011

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Dont give up you've made it five nights so hang in there!!!!! I know it doesnt seem like it know but it will get better. It took me til my dd was almost 18 months to finally sleep through the night! Just hang in there

[deleted account]

I'm so frustrated I just want to give in and give him a bottle but then what have I put him through all this for???? and myself for that matter

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