co-sleeping with mom

Sam - posted on 11/25/2014 ( 9 moms have responded )

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My son he is big 8 years old, he has asthma, mom deny his medical condition.He told me
his room is very cold, he could not sleep ,coughing all night , his mom let him sleep in her bed.
we are divorced for 5 years our son wants to stay with me , while she is trying limit access, she claims that our son start acting out after he sees me, she does not allow overnights with me, but she wants to sleep with him.

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Dove - posted on 11/25/2014

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Then get a good lawyer and take it to court.

WHY did you post here in the first place? You didn't ask any question in your OP...

I didn't 'attack' you and I'm not gender bias. I did say that I'm sorry if you got a bum deal, but I don't know you... and I don't know your ex... so ALL I am going off of in my responses is YOUR words (what I can understand of them, at least)... and you wanting to make a big deal about about a child sleeping w/ his mother.

Sam - posted on 11/25/2014

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i am sorry that you are bios, just because I lost in the past , because she lie
the minor counsel went and ask for the judge to restore the custody time.
you have your opinion and I am glad that you are not make evolution .I am certified foster parent, so don't judge me . I will not respond to such attack because what you
said" to hurt the woman anyway you can" .
I am not bitter ex- looking to hurt the woman i am concerned father, trying to protect the child from the abuse who is committing medical neglect, trying to influence
the child by scaring him off and therething him by abatement if he choose his dad.
sadly you are not alone with gender bios views.

Dove - posted on 11/25/2014

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I'm not ignoring anything. What the heck do you want me to say? You are right and she's a horrible human being? Sorry... not gonna do that. I only have your side to go off of and it sounds a heck of a lot like you are just some bitter ex looking to hurt the woman anyway you can. She doesn't have to do things the way 'you' would do them. If she is neglecting or abusing him... take your evidence to court.

I'm sorry if you've gotten a bum deal, but no GOOD judge is going to take visitation time away from a GOOD parent... so maybe you just got a crap judge... or maybe there's a lot more to the story than you are telling us here.

I don't need to do my own research on anything cuz this isn't my case. You can call it parenting time if you want... or you can call it visitation. It really doesn't matter and the fact that you are making an issue of me using different terminology is pathetic.

You chose to make a post on a site for mom's to crucify your ex for co-sleeping w/ her child... so that is the only part I care to focus on. If you want support for the rest of your rantings... go to a dad's site.

Sam - posted on 11/25/2014

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I am sorry your are not use of correct terminology, it is called parenting time, you can do you own research, the temporary solution. Wow you are bios, or you haven't been in court as a father, I am all for 50/50 it should be the norm but that is not true, but you are bios you still ignoring that child has asthma ,the mother deny him medication, mother alienating the child , all that it didn't matter to you I am sorry I don't want to argue with someone has bios views.
maybe she wants to make him dependent on her so he wants to stay with her since he been asking his attorney to stay with his dad.
she could offered him her blanket, I would offered him mine and stayed in cold
that is difference

Dove - posted on 11/25/2014

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There isn't a thing in the world wrong w/ a CHILD co-sleeping w/ their PARENT. I don't care what gender or age either of them are....

When one child spends most of the time w/ one parent... it is called visitation when they are w/ the other parent. Sorry you don't like my use of correct terminology, but that's your stupid issue to get over... not mine.

If you only have SEVEN hours/week... I'd start looking at yourself and why that is because courts generally like to give 50/50 custody w/out a VERY good reason to rule otherwise.

Maybe the mother let the child sleep w/ her BECAUSE he has a cold bedroom and that was the best, temporary solution she could come up w/ at the time.... or maybe the kid just wants to sleep w/ mom.

Sam - posted on 11/25/2014

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there were no good reasons, she was accusing me that child was acting out after he was with me , accusing me parental alienation , while he told the therapist during the session she told him"if you choose to stay with dad , you can't back to see me, I will no see you" that is parental alienation,so you are wrong, in matter fact there are so many reasons she should have monitor visits not his custody, there are 20 contempt charges against her currently, I am sorry that you missed that child has asthma and cold bedroom, the mother deny his asthma, first why he has cold room while her bedroom is warm? especially cold is not good for his asthma?
I don't need to ask myself if the situation was reversed because he spend x-mas eve night at my home he wanted to sleep in my bed, because he bed was getting smaller , i gave him my bed and I slept on the couch.
if I have the situation reverse which most likely that is going happen 4 months from now
I would not allow him to co-sleep with me.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/25/2014

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Well, not to nitpick, but if you had more time and lost it (for whatever reason, it must have been court decided, right)...there's probably a reason you don't have overnights at this point.

So, good luck with the new evaluation, hopefully that will end up with more contact time for you.

However, your question about co-sleeping with opposite sex parent...do you have suspicions of child abuse/molestation? If so, have it investigated. FYI, my kids would crawl in with me & their dad when they were sick, or needed a cuddle, and generally stayed on my side of the bed (both boys)...and this went on until they were old enough to not need it. THEY got to choose that age.

Ask yourself this: If the situation were completely reversed (You have primary custody, your kid is a girl, and she comes to sleep in your bed), would you appreciate your ex accusing you of sexually abusing the child?

Don't make it about your lack of parenting time and turn this into something petty. If you have VALID CONCERNS, report them.

Sam - posted on 11/25/2014

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I don't have visitation I have parenting time, every week for 7 hours, we had more we lost it, my son wants to stay with me , for that we going have new 730 evolution.
my post for co-sleeping with opposite sex parent ,which I find it unacceptable. Thanks

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