college talk

Angela - posted on 01/16/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My son is very smart
But lazy his in his last year of high school and we try to get him to work on his college prep
Its like pulling teeth
We want him to apply for schools he hasn't yet now his wants to go to community college which I don't. Mind but I feel his doing that because his friends as re going there and his mr know at all please help out
Because I feel that I'm doing something wrong...

3 Comments

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/16/2015

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I work at a university. Let me explain a few things:

1) College isn't for everyone, and college straight out of high school isn't necessary. Let him figure out what he wants to do in life.

2) Community college is a great choice for one who isn't sure what exactly they want to do in life. They are less expensive, but still offer the same quality courses as at a 4 year institution. And, if his friends are attending, they can be a great support system.

3) Forcing your kid to go to college most often ends up with heartache and wasted money. In addition, some students end up with PTSD type symptoms from trying to do something that is against their grain, but they want to 'please' their parents.

4) Once he reaches the age of 18, he doesn't have to heed your wishes. He'll be an adult and able to decide how to spend his life on his own. You cannot, nor should you attempt to force him into anything.

5) pretty much any kid at this age (17-18) thinks they know it all. Sometimes I really wish I could be 17 again so I'd have all of that knowledge! LOL

Michelle - posted on 01/16/2015

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You can't control his life forever and you can't make him do something he doesn't want to do. If you make him go to college and his heart isn't in it he will fail.
You need to let go and let him make his own choices for his future. You can give him advice but it doesn't mean he will follow it.
This is what parenthood is about, raising our children to be able to survive in the big wide world without us!

[deleted account]

You are definitely not doing anything wrong, as frustrating as it is theres no way to make him do his college prep & apply. I would keep encouraging him to apply to the colleges and reminding him how important education is. If he does choose to go to community college, I think the best thing to do would be to support him. Hoping he changes his mind, and applies to colleges.. good luck : )

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