Custody help...

Jme - posted on 03/27/2012 ( 9 moms have responded )

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I have an 8 month old whose father has been absent in her life. He hasn't been around since october 2011 or called or texted to asked about her sides once since then. I have not filed for child support becuase it will nto be fair for her if he sees her just because he is paying child support. I was curious if there is anyone that knows if there is anything that would make him lose his paternal rights. Im in OH and law says if nothing is filed through court i have sole custody of her, until paternity is established. At this point i am not sure if i should just continue keeping track of contact- or lack there of and see what happens or if i should try to see how if posisble he could lose hi paternal rights to her.

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Gwen - posted on 03/29/2012

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If he has never contacted her before, he's not going to start just because he has to pay child support. You definitely should get child support paperwork filed. If he isn't going to support her physically and emotionally, the least he can do is contribute financially. Visitation rights and child support are completely separate issues. You CAN file a motion with the court to have his visitation rights suspended. At that time, they will want to see w/ your documentation about visitation, etc. and hear a rebuttal from him. Most of the time, a court won't terminate parental rights without written consent. Either way, I would suggest you hire an attorney to help you. Don't try to navigate the court system on your own.

Jodi - posted on 03/27/2012

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Why wouldn't it be fair for her if he sees her? Doesn't she have a right to get to know her father if that's what he wants?

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Jme - posted on 04/09/2012

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hes on birth certifcate. But lawyer i talked to said it has to be established through paternity

Tabitha - posted on 03/29/2012

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If paternity isn't already established, he doesn't have any rights to your baby.

Tabitha - posted on 03/29/2012

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Is paternity established either thru the court or on the birth certificate?

Jodi - posted on 03/28/2012

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All I am saying is, you don't need to close that door. File for child support, and then if he decides he wants to see her, and get to know her in the future (and forgive me if I'm wrong, but you sounds like you are both young, so there is a chance he will change his mind), don't shut that idea out entirely. Sure, if he is going to abuse her or cause her harm, then you absolutely must protect her from that, but personally, unless that is the case, leave that avenue open (unless you have a true reason not to). Sure, file for full custody, but if he wants to visit her in the future, don't discount it as an option. And file for the child support. Your daughter also has a right to that.

Jme - posted on 03/28/2012

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Also when he is here he only holds her for maybe 10 minutes then its back to texting or playin on his phone. He has texted me since he was here last.... always about us getting back together not to see how his daughter is or to come see her. He will randomly send me a text that says I miss you.... and no mention of his daughter

Jme - posted on 03/28/2012

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She has a right... but he has no interest. How far is it that when shes older he randomly comes in her life- and if he does randomly to see/find out that he is all about seeing and being with his son but wants/wanted nothing to do with her. The times he comes he is texting on his phone the whole time and usually came with his mom- he was always the one asking to if they were ready to leave and as of the end of august he has only seen her for 2 hours. How fair is that?

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