Dad left 12 year old daughter alone with 15year old boy

Rene - posted on 10/10/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My daughters dad left our daughter alone with a 15 year old boy an entire night and I'm concerned for her safety. She was open about the fact that she was alone with this boy but it seems as tho something happened as she seems very taken with this boy. I'm concerned that her father has exposed her to a situation that she is not ready or matured for. I'm also concerned that something may already have happened as I got her school friend who told me that she was waiting for my daughter to tell her something important that happened over the weekend. I just need to know how to approach this with her and her father without ostracizing or creating animosity between myself and my daughter and her father. I am angry at him or exposing her like that and at the same time don't want her to feel she cannot talk to or trust me.
So I'm appealing to all the moms out there who have experienced this to give me some guidance on how to deal with her and her dad who co parents with me.

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Lisa - posted on 10/12/2016

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I would call or meet with her father to find out exactly what the circumstances were regarding her spending the night alone with this 15 year old. Was it a campout, a sleepover?? Were there other parents involved? Without details it is difficult to reply. I also would ask your daughter’s friend if she would share with you what your daughter tells her regarding her night with the 15 year old so that you have a better understanding as to what is the appropriate action to take. (You may need to talk with her mother so that she can help her daughter realize how important it is for you to protect your daughter’s safety) Next you will need to talk with your daughter. Either way I would want to set up rules regarding overnight visits with her father. If he actually did leave her unsupervised with a 15 year old boy then you may need to go to court to have his overnight visits cut off. Be matter of fact rather than accusing, but do not worry about any animosity that may be created by dealing firmly with this situation. She needs your protection at this time and she will gain trust in you by your providing it.

Krissy - posted on 10/10/2016

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Oh no that's all sorts of wrong. Unless he's a 15 year old gay boy, that's not right and it's not on!
Do you want to be a grandmother? Her father is an irresponsible idiot! I'd be making an anonymous call to the cops or child services and putting the father in, of course they will interview both of you but you're not in the wrong, you didn't know it happened, he's co parenting and doing a poor job too. I'd be livid, I'm livid for you. Under no circumstance should your little girl be left with an older boy alone for an entire night! Do something about it now before it happens again.

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