Dating a single dad whose 9 year old son doesn't have a schedule

Leela - posted on 06/23/2014 ( no moms have responded yet )




Hi. I'm a single mom with a 10 year old dating a single dad with a 9 year old. He's separated from his wife for over a year and they are recently divorced. He feels a lot of guilt over leaving the marriage and wants to ensure that his son isn't negatively impacted. We've been friends for a very long time and I understand how he feels. The challenge I have is that he and his ex have absolutely no visitation schedule. The child goes by whichever parent whenever he feels like. Both parents are fine with this arrangement. I have a schedule for my child but it's extremely open and flexible. He can drop in by his dad anytime and we've worked really hard to create that. My bf doesn't believe in schedules at all. That means I never have a true sense of when we will see each other etc. I'm fully supportive of him being a dad but in my view children need structure and schedules especially when they're getting ready to become teens. We are taking it slow and agreed to hold off on involving our kids in our relationship until we are more certain. But in the meantime, it's pure chaos trying to see each other. How have other moms dealt with this?

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