daughter 18 won't seek work every time I bring up the subject there's

Allison - posted on 09/02/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Every time I bring up my daughter to actively seek work she through tantrums and crys like a baby..she attends college and needs to work and gain experience in the work field she is behaving like a spot brat...I really don't know what to do to get her to understand that she needs to get into work habit for life she literally takes no notice of me she's very bright and stays away from me to avoid this situation and it's getting worse.

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Melissa - posted on 09/03/2015

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Completely agree with @Lisa Smith! It will be hard to do, but reality parenting is the only way to go. She needs to learn skills that allow her to maintain a job, so it's time to stop supplying her with anything other than basic needs. You can do it mama!

Lisa - posted on 09/02/2015

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Stop giving her any money. Yes, she will get hungry. Yes, she will get upset - but she does anyway. If she sees that money doesn't just come to her and wants it that badly, she'll stop asking (but you can't budge) and get that job. You can let her know you will pay for her books, tuition and board (or whatever you're willing to do) but that money for her gas, food, fun money, clothing, etc is all on her. I live in an area where parents get their kids new cars, boats, gas cards, clothing...I don't have that kind of money but even if i did, i would do the same thing. That is, my older children are required to carry their own insurance, pay for their gas in their car and maintenance and any fun money and fun clothing (i'll get essentials but after that, they are buy it). Yes, they were very upset and i heard all the "my friends got (fill in the blank)." My daughter is 21 now and completely independent. She bought her own car, has excellent credit, has a great job, is finishing college and can balance a checkbook. She has actually thanked me - she's further ahead in life than her friends that had it handed to them and she earned it on her own. Give it a shot - you have nothing to lose since she pitches a fit anyway, but this way she'll have to stop because she'll run out of money and will need to get that job. Good luck!

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