Daughter hangs out with younger girls

Annica - posted on 01/23/2016 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My daughter will be 14 in April and she has mild autism - she may be less mature than children at her own development level and has difficulty understanding social situations. One teacher at her local middle school doesn't think it's a good idea for her to be hanging around with 5th grade girls all the time - she had informed me that she will struggle even more in high school next year and that the maturity level between 5th graders and 8th graders is A LOT, because they enter puberty throughout these years. My concern is that she doesn't act her age, and she has no friends at her middle school. I know that later on in life, three years won't be a big difference but I am starting to be concerned that she may struggle right now and also in high school. The teacher has set up several meetings w/ me already, and that my daughter needs a therapist, etc. because she acts like she's very much younger during her classes and elsewhere and that these girls' parents may start to worry that a high schooler is hanging out with 6th graders when they become 6th graders and she is in high school. Any ideas and opinions?

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Dove - posted on 01/23/2016

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Sorry... I frequently use counselor and therapist interchangeably. Therapists do counsel...

If the teacher recommends it... I'd strongly consider looking into it.

Annica - posted on 01/23/2016

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She's been in school counseling ever since elementary school - the teacher suggested that she see a THERAPIST outside of school. My daughter seems to think that there's something "wrong" with her and that's why she was recommended to see one.
She tries to socialize w/ the kids in her grade, but she says that they just ignore her or walk away. They talk about more mature topics and things that she is less likely to be interested in and it makes her feel like she's the "odd girl out". The other teens seem to know things that she doesn't know as much - they mature faster than her, read more mature books than her, is more into social media and their peers, etc.

Dove - posted on 01/23/2016

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If she has mild autism... why hasn't she been in counseling all along? Counselors can be VERY beneficial in this case for support and help role playing certain social situations.

If she doesn't relate well to teens her own age... high school IS likely to be extremely difficult w/out a lot of help and support.

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