Daughter won't sleep in her own bed

Madu - posted on 09/09/2015 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My 7 year old daughter will not sleep in her own room. The only way is if someone sleeps with her or if she sleeps in her brother or sisters room. I have tried to put her in her own bed now but she just cries and cries and if she falls asleep she will then wake up 4-5 times during the night like a baby. I take her back to her room each time she wakes up and I just feel bad. I don't know what to do anymore! Please help me.

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Dove - posted on 09/09/2015

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There isn't anything in the world wrong w/ a child (or an adult) wanting to share a room w/ someone. Married people share rooms.... ;)

If her sister and her both sleep well and don't object... why not have them continue to share a room?

None of my kids have ever slept alone unless it was by their choice. My first two are twin girls, so they have shared a room since birth. The first time they were separated (3rd grade, one was in the hospital overnight) her sister came and slept on the rocking chair in my room. ♥ They have since spent the occasional night alone and done fine... but they are almost 14 years old now.

My 7.5 year old son and I have co-slept his entire life. There will come a time that he doesn't want to sleep w/ me, but as we have the 4 of us in a 2 bedroom place... he's not really going to have much choice until his sisters move out.

I probably have a much more relaxed view of this than many people, but as long as everyone gets sleep... I don't care where they choose to lay their heads.

Melissa - posted on 09/11/2015

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As a now mom I totally understand this from the other side. I couldn't sleep in my own room until I was 12 years old. Some night's I would even go to sleep in my own room and wake up on the floor of my parent's room and not even remember getting there. They set up a flppy cushion for me as an option in case I ever needed it. I realize it may not be the most convenient thing for the adults; and I am sure my parents would have preferred more privacy but it was the best thing for me and I so appreciate them for letting me have that comfort. I think it lead to better sleep for my whole family in the long run.

When I was 12 I simply grew out of it, no idea how or why just did and I never looked back and never had issues sleeping on my own in my own bed ever again and even had my own wonderful apartment with no roommates for a while. So don't worry too much that this will lead to some longer term problem. I think a lot of kids went through this phase and it was just never really talked about.

My 6 year old is going through the same thing right now and some nights are better than others, even I have to remind myself that it is okay. And in the end whatever works best for you family works best for your family.

Sarah - posted on 09/11/2015

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When my now 13 yo started wanting to sleep with his sisters, we resisted it. We set goals and dates for him to get back into his own room. I finally realized it doesn't hurt him or me for him to sleep with his family. The army cot that slid under the bed in my room was perfect. Some nights he'd appear and others he would not. I think when we stopped pushing him to sleep in his own bed he relaxed, we relaxed and over time he moved. I don't think it ever interfered with intimacy with my hubby.

Sarah - posted on 09/09/2015

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I agree completely. Let her sleep where she will actually sleep. My son (now 13) slept on my floor or on the floor of his sisters' room for ages! Probably from 7 thru 11. He just felt better having other bodies in the room with him. As long as it did not bother anyone, fine with me. I actually had a army cot that slid under my bed and he slept on that for a duration too.

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