Daughters father wants access but i fear for daughters wellbeing

Lisa - posted on 11/07/2014 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My daughters father has just applied to courts for access however I am unsure of how to approach it. When's daughter was 6 weeks old I had to report him to the police for being in possession of underage pornpgraphy, social services got involved and Her father admitted everything but was let of without charge as they couldn't prove the girl was only 15 even though the very descriptive title of the video said clearly that she was. It then came to light hat whilst he was working as a music tutor he was having some of his pupils send nude photos to themselves, he managed to dispose of the phones as soon as he realised that the police had been unable to find them in their search. After the case was closed, I allowed access for a while but during this time he state he returned our daughter in was unacceptable. She had an episode of sickness bug and admitted he hadn't bathed her after and just wiped her down and returned her still with sick all over her. We also had concerns from the childminder each time he dropped her off from his about the state she wasnin, the childminder even felt the need to call me at work to ask if I wanted her to bath her as the odour of stale urine was unbearable. There have been repeated incidents like this so I stopped access for my daughters sake, however now be has gone through the courts and I am terrified that they will let him have access to her and harm will come to her. Any advice/thoughts please?

6 Comments

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Michelle - posted on 11/09/2014

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Like we have said, talk to a lawyer. This is an international forum and the laws are different in each country as well as each state. We can't give you advice as it may be wrong for your area.

Lisa - posted on 11/09/2014

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I have all documentation, copies of social services letters, the courts can get copies of the arrest notes etc as it states clearly he admitted all responsibility for the underage videos, copies of text messages admitting the neglect etc, documented concerns from the childminder etc and photographic evidence of the concerning way she was returned to us with the date and time attached etc. should this be enough? OH And copies of messages saying that he refuses to pick her up on his contact days as he has other plans

Jodi - posted on 11/07/2014

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As the other ladies have said, you need a lawyer and you need EVIDENCE. The problem here is that you chose to stop access. The courts won't look upon this favourably unless you have solid evidence to demonstrate why. If you don't, it is his word against yours and could result in you losing custody on the basis of parental alienation. So go and talk to a good lawyer.

Michelle - posted on 11/07/2014

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I agree with the other ladies, get a lawyer and tell them all you have said here.
You can't just stop access so that may go against you in court. I would be pushing for supervised visits as well.

Dove - posted on 11/07/2014

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Get a lawyer and compile your evidence. Hopefully you have documentation of all the instances and all your claims. Push for supervised access (shows you want your daughter to know her father, but you want to make sure she is safe). Good luck!

Guest - posted on 11/07/2014

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Tell your attorney about everything that went on, give him or her copies of any papers you have related to his previous arrests and charges filed against him (even if they were dismissed), and tell your attorney that you want to a adamantly push for 3rd party supervised visitation. ....Get the best attorney you can find.

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