Aurelia - posted on 07/23/2015 ( 9 moms have responded )
It has been 2 and a half years since my daughter has seen her father, she is now 6. He has made the choice to stay away. He would rather not see his child than to pay court ordered child support. He calls every week to talk with her, that's the extent of his parenting role and therefore that makes him super dad in his eyes. Yes, I am angry/bitter, whatever you want to call it. He's hurting my child with his selfish behavior. These calls cause a rollercoaster of emotions for her. She's happy to hear from him, but after the call she is either weeping wanting to know why her daddy hasn't come back to see her, that he must not love her enough, or she is angry & acts out. I try to smooth things over to protect her little heart. (I do not speak of him in front of her.) I tell her "Daddy would be here if he could, he loves you very much. I tell her I know that she is upset and it's okay to feel that way, even though you have these feelings you can't be destructive or act ugly to mommy. She wants to know when he's coming back and I have to tell her that mommy doesn't have that answer. This is one that mommy can't fix.
My heart breaks for her and it ticks me off all at that same time. I am struggling with what to do, what's best for her. I think about not answering the phone calls anymore. The calls seem to cause more turmoil for her than good for her. Do I keep answering the calls and watching her get her little heart broken every Sunday? Or cut all ties until he does get his act together and comes back around?(if ever)
I struggle with what to do, I just don't know what's best thing to do in the long run.