Death of a grandmother

Kristy - posted on 10/22/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My 9 year old son is been having a tough time since the death of my mother. She passed in April of this year. Robbie was so close to her, he spoke with her everyday sometimes 3 times a day. My dad met someone very shortly after mom's death and got engaged within a few months and now is marring two days after what would have been my mom's 71st birthday. The new girlfriend doesn't allow dad to spend time with Robbie without her. What to do to help my precious son to be ok with all this? It is affecting his school work. I try to do things with him like mom did and write him notes of how much I love him. But it breaks my heart that nothing I do seems to help. So if anyone has any advice I am all ears.....

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Kristy - posted on 10/26/2013

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Saadiqa thank you for your comment. I will try to encourage my dad to have "boy time". I hope that will help. I just feel useless as a mom. I do not express my feelings about these things with Robbie because what and how I feel is between my dad and me. I do not want him to have my feelings I want him to have his own feelings. He asks a lot of what I feel and I reply I want his grandpa to be happy and not be sad. I am a firm believer that as a mother it is not my calling to discourage my children with my feelings of disagreement. Maybe that is wrong but they are their own selves. I do appreciate your advice and I will encourage both to be honest with each other and spend time with one another alone. Blessings to you.

Saadiqa - posted on 10/22/2013

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Hi....May God cure his precious heart. Children are fairly resilient..TIME is the key..patience and lots lotsa love. Perhaps you should have a chat with your dad...and encourage some "boy time" together. You can never replace the granny in his memory and heart....you probably making it worse...just try to support him in whicheva way you are able to. Give him lotsa love....and quality time....

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