Evelyn - posted on 11/17/2014 ( no moms have responded yet )
I am a single mother of two small boys (4 & 8). A month ago my nephews came to live with me while mom relocates to another state and get's it together (She did not want to leave them with dad, my brother who loves his children). My new boys are now (7 & 12). They were moved from sunny FL to VA and after school is over, they will move with mom in IL. (That in itself is a lot).
Now to the issues, my oldest (8) is having a very hard time adjusting to all of the people in the house. (We have a 2 bedroom and my parent's and niece are also staying with us until December - mom will be picking up my niece who is 4 and parents will be going home). My son has had some attitude and behavior issues, he's been extremely emotional and angry at times. (There are times when the boys do get along, but my son ultimately wants his space back). My nephews, are use to going from house to house as mom often left them anywhere she could to enjoy life. Now, they are in a stable home, although a single parent home I pry myself on keeping a level of stability, respect, and order. My oldest nephew thinks he is "Mr. Sexy Floridian Casanova, and too cool for school. (It may be the adjustment, acting out or just who he is), however, today I received a call from his math teacher who is disappointed that he is not performing in class and chooses the worse times to have conversations in class, disturbing other students and not focusing on his work. I spoke to my brother and he will have a discussion with him over the phone this afternoon, his mother has yet to reply to me and I plan on speaking to him.
My question is, under the circumstance, should I maintain my firm approach and discuss his behavior as well as take all entertainment and outdoor play for a week. Or should I take a gentle approach and give him a break to prove his behavior can change?
How should I approach the situation on all avenues. I know there is a lot going on in this message but there is a lot going on in my home and I am responsible for at least 5 kids until December, two adults (parents), and then it will be 4 boys and me until next Summer. I don't want to lose it, but in the pursuit of being there for family I am slowly losing my edge.