Disrespectful 22 year old daughter...PLEASE help

Lucy - posted on 04/28/2015 ( no moms have responded yet )




First time on site and I need help...badly! I will try and keep it short. Background, I had daughter at 19 and I was single parent due to her bio father drug addict and very abusive. Never received financial support in all these years from him. Always did the best for my daughter and she never wanted for anything. When she was 12 I even bought a bigger house in a different neighborhood so she can have kids around to play with. She was a well-rounded kid growing up. Decent grades in school, nice friends, etc.

At 14 (8 years ago) she started to change. She has been rude and nasty towards me for no apparent reason. A few examples are:

-writing her name on foods she has purchased
-I had a few pieces of lettuce in box in fridge, she wrote "really mom" on the container
-Has her boobs hanging ALL out at church!!
-Doesn't clean up her mess in kitchen
-She dripped red dye on carpet and trying to clean it with hydrogen peroxide, I told her to leave it alone and to get the carpet cleaner and she ignored me
-When she would come home around 1am, would make all kinds of noise in room, bathroom, steps (no courtesy for us sleeping)
-Took her weeks to thank great-grandmother for sending her $1,500 for graduation
-Never thanked her grandparents (my parents) for giving her $2,000 towards the purchase of a used car
-Stared me down in my face and said and I quote, "Why in the hell didn't you save money for me for college"
-I told her that I don't like it when her boobs are all out and she told me that if I don't like it, then I don't have to see her or her boobs again.

The last example happened today and I don't know how to deal with this. Honestly, I want to strangle her but I don't know how to deal with this. She has been treating me this way for 8 years and I have had it.

She moved out of the house 2 1/2 years ago (good thing) and she lives with her boyfriend.

I am not sure if I want to speak with her anymore.

My husband (not her father) and I met 18 years ago and we have been married for 8 years. He has been nothing but supportive of me and today he suggested that I take a step back and leave her alone.

I am more hurt than anything that she has total lack of respect for me. It hurts really bad.

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