Do you feel guilty taking care of your own needs?

Mary - posted on 11/08/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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It's much like your traveling on a flight with your child. You're told should the mask drop, put yours on first, then assist your child. Do mothers think to take care of their physical health first? If they are not here, who will be there for their children?

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No! I don't feel guilty at all for taking care of myself first.

In the very example you gave, it would be stupid to put the mask on the child first because it will take much longer to get the mask on the child than to secure your own mask. You could very likely lose consciousness before you get the mask on either of you, then who have you helped? No one. You'll both die, whereas if you'd just taken care of your own mask first, you would have plenty of time to take care of the child's mask. Or, you'll end up getting the mask on the child then leaving them with no mother because you spent so much time on his/her's that you never had time for your own.

I do not neglect my needs in daily life either. I do ensure my child's needs are met, but many of his needs depend on my needs being met first. I cannot be an effective or successful mother if I am over stressed, depressed, or malnourished in any fashion. A happy, balanced mom is better equipped to create a happy, balanced child.

Brooklyn - posted on 11/08/2013

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I feel guilty all the time about taking care of me first, but remember. In order to properly care for your children, you must first take care of their mother. In the scenario you alluded to, you put your mask on first. And then put your child's mask on. Don't get me wrong. I buy necessities like food and clothes for my children before I even think about myself. However, if you are to care for, protect and properly raise children, you need to take care of your physical, emotional, and mental well being first.

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