do you think that we should always throw a huge birthday party for our kids

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Silvana - posted on 03/20/2009

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Absolutely not!! Kids are simple and are easily amused. A birthday cake and immediate family and attention is all they want. Kids don't have birthday expectations, only the parents do, so it's up to you to set the standard that meets your budget.

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User - posted on 05/12/2014

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I have been asking myself the same question. I have come to the decision that kids do not need big parties! I don't have a lot of friends anyway. My son's birthday is in August, long week end. He will be 6 and I am worried what will happen when I tell him there will be no party. I will have family over of course and like last year, he can invite one friend. But, in total he only as three friends anyway and then his school friends. But, I don't really know his school friends that well. He buses to and from school, so I do not really get to meet the parents at drop off and pick up. He does not have a special friend he comes home with and always talks about either. So, I am not sure. Any ideas on what to do?

User - posted on 03/25/2009

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Hmmm not sure, it's exhusting planning big bday's as im feeling it at the moment. My lil boy turns 1 this weekend and it's our 1st bday palnning. I guess ill c how it goes and decide from there.

Yesminn - posted on 03/25/2009

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i try to always throw a small one but first i start off with small idea then it gets to become a big one lol and i dont have any idea how it happens or my boyfriend with keep giving me ideas so hes no help like usual. so her birthday is in june she will be 6 and its going to be in sweet and sassy and she is getting a spa party with 10 friends who all get gifts bags that im making myself but im trying to tell evryone around me that this is her last one till her 10th . i just have no idea how to say NO and stay strong

Amie - posted on 03/20/2009

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Depends on how you feel about it. When our children were/are small it was a family only celebration. Then when our oldest started school the actual parties started.
It's been fun. Her first year we took the kids to the zoo and a BBQ. They loved it. Grade 1 we had it at home and set up the kids waterslide and bouncy castle (we didn't rent them because we already owned them lol) the kids had fruit trays, vegetable trays and a meat tray for snacks. Which I had to refill twice, my god can kids eat! LOL! Last year we went to our in-laws and the kids got to play on the trampoline and go on quad rides with my FIL and hubby plus they had the slip n slide and water guns, etc.. They had fun with that. Our oldest obviously has a summer birthday. lol.
This year she wants us to take them to the Fun factory. Probably will, it's not overly costly, has a huge jungle gym, rock climbing, arcade games, laser tag, etc for the kids. Plus with our newest addition being added next week I don't feel like doing all that stuff again. Our son starts Kindergarten next year too so there will be two that we'll be doing this for now. But before school we never saw the point.
When their little the only ones who really care is the family. lol!

Christelle - posted on 03/20/2009

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I'm staying so far away from that!  Never like parties, luckily my boy's the same.  He also doesn't like going to the bashes.  We've been to a couple of home parties the past month (how things differ between neighbourhoods!) and it was lovely.  A couple of kids, plate of chips and few sweeties, fruit juice, cake to eat with you hands, and they played in the garden. Had a lovely time at all of these. We've only had 1/2 friends over, last year one set of cousins as well.  And then only barbequed hotdogs and had cake, kids played in the sandpit and on jungle gym.  No clowns, face painting, jumping castles, pony ridesfarmanimalswildanimalspartypacksdesigners cakesplacesettings etc for me .

Alison - posted on 03/20/2009

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totally agree with helen if kids are happy and can run around then they dont need masses of people around them. They enjoy the attention no matter how many people are around. I just invite a few friends and family and thats the lot, kids are happy and so is my bank balance.

Helen - posted on 03/20/2009

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In most cases as long as kids can run around, make a mess with their friends and eat as much junk as they want they are happy. I went to a hippy friends party she threw for her 4 year old. They only had healthy food and water and for entertainment they were supposed to read books! It was the most boring thing i had ever been to - until her little boy ( a bit of a rebel) started to throw cake and all his friends joined in. Just let them have the freedom to be messy and they will love it.

[deleted account]

We do the family get together deal with the exception of milestones. As parents we have to be careful not to try to "keep up" with other parents, ie. giving into peer pressure, which is the same thing we should be teaching our children. A friend of mine has a really good idea when it comes to parties... If you are going to allow your child to have a party and invite their friends, only invite the number of friends that your child is old. In other words, if your child is turning 5, then they can have 5 friends at their party (with the exception of family members that you decide to invite). She did this with a sweet 16 party as well and with fewer friends it is much easier to do something really special to celebrate.

[deleted account]

I think its awesome when parents throw Birthday parties for there children..But on a reasonable note, If you can do it then why not...But You dont always have to throw a Huge party, Ask your kids what they would want and compromise on that issue!

Monica - posted on 03/20/2009

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I would have to say no. 1st bday, and 5th (so that he could have friends from school) have been the only ones we have done so far. We might do another one for his 10th (double digits...lol). Other than that it has just been low key.

[deleted account]

No. We have 6 kids. I rotate the parties and most of them are at home. I think going to places are a rip off.You can do fun stuff at home. We have 2 in feb we do sledding, snowmen contest, snow painting, snow ball fights them have them make their own snowman cupcakes,  2 with b days in June so we do a cookout in the park, 1 at the end of september for hers we do it about 2 weeks late so we can do a halloween bash & 1 in december is now 15 but I use to do slumber parties or just activties at home (hers was nice for other parents cause her bday is a week before xmas and people got to drop off their child and go shopping for a few hours).





[deleted account]

I think that kids expect birthday parties these days, but they've gotten out of hand.  I remember all of my parties when I was growing up just involved a few friends and they were at my house.  Now kids want big parties at expensive venues.  For my daughter, we have always done family get togethers until she was 4.  Then she got her first "big party" with friends away from the house.  5 and 6 were family get togethers.  This year she requested a party with "friends, not just aunts" so we're going to have a few of her friends over to the house.  It's definately possible to make a memorable great birthday without having a big expensive party.  Just be sure the birthday child is involved in the planning so that they feel like they're getting what they want.



 

[deleted account]

In a quick answer...No. Birthdays are a big deal; but if you always throw a huge over the top party for your child, they will come to expect it and no longer appreciate it. Plus, they will just expect each subsequent party to be bigger and better. Do what truly fits your budget and invite close friends and family... save big parties for milestone bdays such as 5,10,16,18 etc.

Lisa - posted on 03/20/2009

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We do an every other year thing.  10 being the last of  real biggies.  Then we skip to 13 (teenager) and our next will be 16, 18, 20 and of course 21. Pretty much the mile stones.  Also, definiton of big.  When my kids were small it was just a couple of friends because our family is so big. No we do 2 parties a family party and a friends (the friends is the every other year one) Family always ventures over for cake.

Elizabeth - posted on 03/20/2009

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No need to throw big ones every year. Especially if you have a grandparent willing to do it for you. I would think the time that is most important is 13 and beyond.

Heather - posted on 03/20/2009

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I have 3 kids and we always offer a choice a rockin gift or a rockin party. Sometimes the 2 oldest both boys combine their rockin gift in lieu of party (ie Wii). My daughter however still prefers the rockin party.

Darlene - posted on 03/20/2009

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Quoting Yesminn:

do you think that we should always throw a huge birthday party for our kids



No it's fine to just have cake, ice cream with family and friends.  Some of our best parties have been at home.  My 16 year old as only had 3 big birthday parties and she is just fine. 



Kids that have big parties every year always want a bigger and better one the next year.  Once you get sucked into it your kid will be spoiled rotten and you will regret later.



Good Luck and wishing yours many happy Birthdays.



Darlene mother of 2 and a grandmother

Amy - posted on 03/20/2009

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No way.  It can become way to stressful for everyone.  For me, Madi will have small parties until she makes her friends in pre-school/kindergarden...then we'll see.  But, to each their own, just make sure the birthday baby is the one having fun. :)

Michelle - posted on 03/20/2009

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I think all that really matters is that your kiddo knows how happy you are that he/ she is alive! Isn't that what a birthday is, after all, the celebration of life?

Dawn - posted on 03/20/2009

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for my daughter we only invited our close families...our parents and siblings and their children. that being said we kinda have big families so it ends up being bigger than i thought. but to keep the cost down we just have finger foods and then we make a cake or cupcakes. i don't give out goddie bags usually...just give each kid a balloon to take home and they are always satisfied with that:) she will only be 4 this year so until she gets to school and has a lot of friends to invite doing it this way is more than sufficient for her.

Laurie - posted on 03/20/2009

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I love birhday parties, but my husband never had them as a child, so he doesn't feel they are necessary!  We have come to a compromise and only have big parties for the big milestone years (parties inviting friends from school and stuff).  We both agree that birthdays are suppose to make them feel special for the day, so we always make a big deal of that day, and both my parents and his parents have some type of dinner and small get together to celebrate.  I have 2 children and their birthdays are only 6 days apart  and my birthday is only 3 days after so we always doour family get togethers for all 3 of us combined on both sides!

Ivy - posted on 03/20/2009

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I think it depends on your resources. I think each year should be celebrated, how huge you do it is up to you. Huge to one person may be small to the next. Ideally, I wish I could throw a party each year for each of my children (2)......how big it became depends on how many family and friends would attend and the resources I have to accomodate them.

Emily - posted on 03/20/2009

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Good lord, no. Every few years I will do a party but typically we're pretty low key especially for the first birthday- they don't care at all then.

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