Do your men change diapers?

Merry - posted on 07/06/2011 ( 47 moms have responded )

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Matt will only change Eric if necessary, or if I ask. He won't do pooh ones unless literally no one else can because he really gags at the smell, he's always been super sensitive to smells.....
He hasn't changed fierna's diaper yet, she's two months old, and he likely will never change her diaper unless he's alone with her.
Reason for this is he thinks it feels wrong for him to be looking at, and wiping off her girl parts.
So I know many dads change diapers, and don't have issues changing girls either.
But he really feels strongly that he shouldn't so I accept that and have no problem handling diapers.
I've been attempting cloth diapers andge fully supports whatever decision I make to use cloth or disposable.

He's very helpful and does alot of the parenting work, just not diapers.

Anyone else have a husband not want to do diapers specifically with girls?

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Sherri - posted on 09/06/2011

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Interesting each to their own I guess. We just don't raise the kids that way so it is hard to see others are so modest about raising theirs.
Even the daycare kids because they are all so young and potty training do their business in front of everyone as their to young to have the door closed. I dress them, change them in front of all the other kids too, even my husband helps on occasion. My 5yr old still dresses in front of them too. It is just our norm so odd to hear the opposite stance on it.

Sherri - posted on 09/05/2011

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I see ZERO difference between a girl or a boy they are babies for crying out loud. Why is there such a taboo thing with dads caring for there daughters. I just don't get it, it makes me extremely sad.

Merry - posted on 07/10/2011

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Yeah Sharon I agree entirely. And believe me matt is not like that. He does plenty to help raise our kids. He even cooks dinner :) it's not a big deal to me, I don't mind doing diapers, he hates it. We divvy up chores equally but choose what we prefer when possible.

[deleted account]

I have to say, and please remember that this is only my opinion and not directed at anyone in specific- but I personally think it's kind of selfish of a father NOT to expect to parent their own child from changing a diaper, or bathing, or getting, dressed, etc. Why SHOULDN'T a father change his own kid?! Why should a father just sit back, relax, and watch the mom do all the child-rearing? Now don't misunderstand special circumstances like 1 parent physically getting ill/gag reflex when changing smooshed poopie diapers, or cleaning up projectile vomit. I completely understand if 1 parent can handle that part of parenting over another parent-that parenting style suits that couple. But it really does bother me when a father won't lift a damn finger to change a diaper-like it's OK to get a diaper rash instead of dealing with cleaning up your own kid becasue they don't want to, or "the wife does it better". That's bullshit, and a cop-out, IMO. LEARN how to be a parent! I guess it was never an option for my husband-WE had a child, therefore WE both took on the responsibilities of parental duties.

Sylvia - posted on 07/07/2011

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Nope.

Well, maybe he didn't *want* to do it, but he did it. In fact, there were times when he did a lot more diaper-changing than I did, since I was the one with the milk factory ;)

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Merry - posted on 09/06/2011

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Yeah I have some sweet bath shots of Eric but angled to keep his penis hidden. My husband found a nude pic of himself in his moms photo album and he ripped it up. :)

Stifler's - posted on 09/06/2011

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I don't take naked pics either Laura unless it's cute bath pictures where their genitals aren't showing. But I do make Damian change nappies, if I have to do it so does he! lol

Merry - posted on 09/06/2011

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I think that's one of my favorite things about CoM is realizing just how different others can be! Sometimes it's nice to see a different perspective.

Merry - posted on 09/06/2011

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Well my dad was emotionally abusive to me in my teen years, and while it was never violent per say or sexual at all it just makes me sick to imagine him changing or bathing me as a baby.

Maybe its just because we have such a non relationship.

Idk.

Yeah I really wouldn't let anyone see my kids naked, at any age since birth. I have no nude pictures of either child except one video of Eric eating/playing with refried beans naked :) and only one video of Fierna without a shirt on but these videos are private only.

[deleted account]

No. Not unless he's home alone with the kids. If we're home together, he'll come find me to tell me that my daughter's diaper is dirty.

Sherri - posted on 09/06/2011

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Wow interesting why do you have a problem with it Laura. I can't even begin to understand??? Heck why can't family members change them or people see them naked. At family parties heck I still change them into swim suits etc. in front of everyone at 4 or 5.

I guess I just don't understand why it is so taboo for your own father to have bathed you or changed your diaper. Seems like there has to be a reason. I have no qualms that he changed my diaper, bathed me or anything else. It is completely normal and only abnormal if he had issues with it.

Merry - posted on 09/06/2011

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Well I think he was influenced by me expressing how I feel uncomfortable thinking about my dad bathing or diapering me as a baby. I covered up pictures I had of him holding me in a bath towel because it disgusts me to imagine him washing me as a baby. So matt doesn't want to do that to his daughter. I always keep my kids privates private. Even as babies, no pictures of them naked, no family members changing diapers if possible and when I change their diapers I make sure no one can see them naked.

Yet, I'm totally fine with the kids seeing us naked, I bathe with my 2 year old, he's still breastfed, idk, seems confusing, but really I just think nudity is fine in home with family but not anywhere else. and I try to respect my babies privacy even if they don't care yet.

Stifler's - posted on 09/05/2011

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I agree I don't get the difference between a girl baby and a boy baby. Personally I think it's an excuse, it's your child.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 09/05/2011

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He has to change them when I deal with hot peppers. Infact, unless he is home to change diapers, I cannot use them. i don't want to burn my baby.

On that note, if you are fine changes all the diapers, have at it. Nothing wrong with it if you don't feel there is a problem. Personally I think it is weird for him not to.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 09/05/2011

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My husband changes diapers all the time. I have a 5 year old boy, and a 16 month old girl. Neither of us have felt uncomfortable with him changes his own daughters diapers. My husband has also taken baths with both children. No shame in bodies over here.

Michelle - posted on 09/05/2011

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My husband changes our daughter, bathes her, dresses her, feeds her and everything else. He helped create her so why can't he help look after her? He even gets in the bath with her sometimes. There's nothing wrong with it, I have photo's of myself in the bath with my Dad and he never did anything to me.



IMO society has put fear into Dad's being Dad's especially to their girls.

[deleted account]

It works both ways though I mean are you prepared to do all the dirty jobs men have to do? Im sorry but when the drains are blocked im not going out there with rods in the pissing down rain, if the car breaks down im not getting my fingers jammed and all oily poncing about fixing it. In my house there are things he does and things i do nappy changing is my job and i dont mind that he doesnt like doing it.

Britt - posted on 07/10/2011

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Yes of course anytime he smells or holds her and feels the need to be changed he will! I have the best DH ever! Very proud of him.

Stifler's - posted on 07/10/2011

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Ba ha ha ha I have no regard for gag reflex. My husband tried that on me once and I said he shouldn't have had kids if you can't handle shit!

[deleted account]

seriously? sounds to me like the whole "not comfortable with girl parts" is just a way to avoid diapers! but hey, if you are fine with it and feel supported enough in other areas then more power to you. My hubbs has been the primary diaper changer (cloth diapers also) in the family with all our girls... we switch off working from home and he also bathes them and with them and he takes them to the bathroom in public (the ones that are potty trained). So... no.... my hubbs wants to do everything he can to bond with our kiddos. He would nurse them if he could so i guess diapers, baths, getting them to sleep when he can successfully :-)

[deleted account]

My hunni has only ever changed our son he wont change our daughter for the same reason, he knows eventually its gonna happen I means odds are one day he's going to be alone with her and she'll need a change but I think he's deluded himself into thinking I'll be breastfeeding until shes potty trained lol. I know a lot of dads who don't want to change their daughters its normal but I know dads who don't have an issue with it and thats fine too. Everyone has their own comfort level, I've been less comfortable changing my son's diapers for the past while because he keeps getting stiffys some moms wouldn't bat an eyelash but for me its weird. Everyones different.

Aarin - posted on 07/09/2011

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I do 98% of the diapers in the house but my husband works out of town so that is a major factor. But when he is home and I ask him to change a bum he will without issue (or maybe a big sigh).

Jilene - posted on 07/09/2011

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If he helps with most things count your lucky stars! Many men don't even lift a finger. And many men don't do cloth diapers excet maybe folding the clean ones.

Amber - posted on 07/07/2011

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Mine changed diapers. He did his clinicals in an OB..so at first he was much better at it than I was. That was really annoying.



We've always shared all parenting duties equally. Our only issue-he's lax on discipline. That boy has him wrapped around his finger most of the time. We're really screwed if we ever have a daughter...lol

Stifler's - posted on 07/07/2011

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My baby girl has peed when we take her nappy off more than my 18 month old boy ever has!

Sylvia - posted on 07/07/2011

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Elfrieda, I learned that lesson when I was 11 years old, the first time I changed my first boy cousin's diaper. Nobody had thought to warn me, for some reason ... LOL.

Medic - posted on 07/07/2011

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I always just covered his penis with the clean diaper. Never got peed on from the boy...now the girl peed on me. I didn't breastfeed so I should have used that I am not comfy crap on my husband to get out of changing the boy. His diapers could be used as biological warfare.

Merry - posted on 07/07/2011

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Lol elfraida I remember the nurses in the hospital told me to point it down!
No I don't think moms can get out of diapering boys, after all your son grew I side you, you pushed him out your body, and feed him from your breasts!
I didn't think it was weird that my husband didn't change our daughters diapers, but I guess it's not normal.

Elfrieda - posted on 07/07/2011

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Haha! I didn't feel comfortable changing my son's diaper for a long time, I'll tell you that. I had lots of questions for my husband about what was normal and which parts would hurt if I wiped them too roughly. Also, my husband had to teach me to point the penis DOWN. I washed a lot of peed-on outfits before he finally thought to inform me of this. :P

Gwen - posted on 07/07/2011

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So, does this mean all the moms can get out of changing boy diapers because they "don't feel comfortable" with it?

Medic - posted on 07/07/2011

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My husband does diapers even if we are both home. We have kind of always done, who ever notices it changes it. He also bathes both kids. Our oldest is a boy and our youngest is a girl and they usually bathe together.

Jenn - posted on 07/07/2011

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My husband always did. Maybe not without gagging dramatically over poop diapers though:). Butt wiping continues for several years, so some husbands need to step up and help out!!

[deleted account]

My husband doesnt change nappies either even to the point that he will wait half hour for me to come home to do it. On the upside he sorts the dog crap out because Im not doing that.

Ntahli - posted on 07/07/2011

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Mine hadnt, It has never happened. And I know it will never happen but I dont when time goes for the second born, if ever I have one.

Anna - posted on 07/07/2011

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My husband had a bit of an issue when we brought our son home as a newborn, but he watched Aidan one day a week by himself so he grew out of it. And now that I'm stationed overseas he doesn't have much of a choice. ;)

Stifler's - posted on 07/06/2011

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Yes. He tries to get out of it by whining but never does. He changes both sexes.

Jodi - posted on 07/06/2011

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My husband never had an issue. He is still happy to organise her bath for her now and she is 6. He doesn't wash her anymore, though, but there is no need to, as she is capable of washing herself. But up until she was capable, he didn't have a problem with it.

Lady Heather - posted on 07/06/2011

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He did the first one and he's been doing them regularly ever since. In the first two weeks of her life he changed most of them actually because I was so sick. He actually had to show me how. Haha.

JuLeah - posted on 07/06/2011

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Parents change diapers. Boy, girl, doesn't matter ... parents change diapers

Elfrieda - posted on 07/06/2011

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I don't think my husband knows "not changing diapers" is an option. ;) Let's keep it that way, shall we?

[deleted account]

We are a very open and not modest around each other in my family. My husband changes diapers and bathes both girls. The only issue along these lines that we've faced is the public restroom issue. My oldest is potty trained. My husband is not comfortable with taking her to potty, because he doesn't know which bathroom to go to. He's not comfortable taking her to the men's and she can't go alone in the women's.

Amanda - posted on 07/06/2011

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If I had someone else to change the pooey nappies I'd let them do it too :)

My hubby doesn't like changing my daughter, he felt abit funny cleaning her down there too but he does it. I think it was because he was worrieed he wasn't going to clean her properly. He was the same with baths. I showed him how to do it and now when he's home the kids ask for him to bath them.

Katherine - posted on 07/06/2011

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Yep. Mine never did. He hated the poop, and I couldn't handle the vomit, so it worked out just fine :)

Same situation if he was alone he would do it, but when my girls were little especially, he wouldn't.

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