Saliana - posted on 07/02/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )
I really don't want a divorce.
Been married for a couple of years now. Problem (or the good thing?) is we have a commuter marriage. We live almost 300 miles away but no one can really change that. He started abusing me and torturing me emotionally during the pregnancy, That's when he left for a job very far away leaving me alone (no family were I live) for the last two months of pregnany. I should also say that he refused to come around my due date b/c he didn't want to waste his paternity leave if I hadn't had the baby non time. So I went to the hospital alone when my water broke.
Anyhow, things never got better. He rarely called me to check on me or baby. He'd call maybe once a month and it's usually after I call him. He never answered the phone b/c he's way too 'busy'. Now we're staying with him for a few weeks and he's disrespectful. He works 13 hours a day so we never really get to see or spend time with him. Baby doesn't know him at all.
We have been arguing a lot!!! like crazy! He comments on everything I say or do and always always criticizes me. I told him to stop, but he never changed. Today we had an argument and he said, literally. "you make me hate you. I really hate you and if you spend months away from me, I honestly don't even remember you or care about you." I cried and didn't know how to respond b/c it was really harsh. I love him even though we have so many issues. I think it just hurt me so much that has actually never cared about me or even loved me.
His business is doing well and he has been hiring lots of female employees, most of them are divorced. I think I also made a mistake and commented way too much on that fact, but mostly b/c he never told me. I visited his office and found them all there. He has a good relationship with one of them, I visited more than once without notice and found them talking and laughing and discussing her personal issues like her two kids and her apt hunting.
I should also mention that, by complete coincidence, I was playing with his iphone (I don't have one so I check his sometimes b/c I think they're cool) and I found out he joined match.com. when I confronted him he said he never really signed up or filled in hin info/page nor made a payment, and that he was just fooling around. I believed and forgave him.
I'm so sorry for the long post, but I am depressed, caring for a baby all by myself and have absolutely no family and friends. What would you do if you were me?