Ex against ADHD medication

Esmie - posted on 09/30/2013 ( 6 moms have responded )

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What do you do if your ex threatens to "take you to court" if you give your child medication?

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TA - posted on 09/30/2013

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If he does take you to court, he's going to have to hire a lawyer and probably pay a doctor to testify as an expert witness about the negatives of the medication. Does he have deep pockets? If so, he may be serious about his threat, but if not, I think he's bluffing.

If the dad can't even be bothered to participate in the diagnostics, it sounds to me like he's just spouting off. It would not look good for him in court when it comes out that he declined to participate.

If your doctor/specialist has good credentials and diagnostics have been done to indicate your child has a condition that can be treated by medication, it will be a tough case for your ex to prove. We've had our kiddo evaluated by the school's psychologist & team of OT/PT, etc. [which was a very in-depth process], our pediatrician, and we've had a full day evaluation at Riley Children's Hosp. in Indianapolis. After several years of trying other things, I decided to try meds. So far, so good, with no side effects that I can see, my kiddo is having a lot less problems in school. Her problems have been mostly behavior and social; academically, she's done great, in the gifted program, too.

If you and the doctors think trying meds is the best option for your child, then you try them. We went with low dose, short acting, longest on the market, which seemed like the safest bet to me. Everyone's case is different.

Julie A - posted on 09/30/2013

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Good, well most likely he is trying to get a rise out of you if he's done it before. Even if he does take you to court he doesnt stand a chance with everything you have to back it up, so let him waste his money! My ex used to be like that. I learned when I acted not threatened at all and kept that "bring it!" Attitude he didn't know how to act and was All talk. Keep us informed. I hope the med. helps your son.

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TA - posted on 09/30/2013

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Oh, wow, he sounds like a piece of work. :) You hang in there, Esmie, and don't let him rattle you. You are doing the right things for your child, and you should feel good about yourself for that. Sometimes you just have to press on and do what you feel is necessary. I had to go behind my husband's back to get my kiddo help when she was not talking by age 2 1/2. He didn't want to admit there was anything wrong [we still struggle with that overall issue sometimes], but I finally just decided to heck with it, my kid needs help, and I'm gonna get her some. Wishing you all good things!

Esmie - posted on 09/30/2013

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No, he does not have deep pockets. He actually just filed for bankruptcy! And, did I mention he has two other babies?

When I reminded him that I asked him to come to the appointment, he told me that I had no proof that I had actually asked. This is the kind of person he is.

I already spoke to the pediatrician, ADHD doc, and the teachers. They are all willing to provide documented proof that he needs it.

Thanks for your comment!

Esmie - posted on 09/30/2013

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Thanks Julie. In the past, I was also against it. However, now that I have been having a lot of problems with my 4yr old's behavior, I am considering it. I have done my research and asked the doctor for a non-stimulant medication. He has not had any other side effects, other than drowsiness, which is common for the first couple of weeks.

I informed my ex that I was considering taking our son to a specialist. I even asked him to come, but he said he did not have time for that. Now, that he is starting his medication, he is totally involved, but not for the right reasons. He has been threatening me that he is taking me back to court.

I do have my pediatrician's support as well as the director and teachers at my son's daycare. He is the kind of person that will say all kinds of things just to scare me, and I hope that is the case again.

Julie A - posted on 09/30/2013

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If thats what you want for you child, tell him you will see him in court. Get all your paperwork from the physician and even get a second opinion to back yourself up in court. If you tell him that I bet he will back down. Hes probably just all talk anyway an trying to shake you up.Personally I don't agree with ADHD medication, but that's only my opinion . I've never hear of any positive outcomes from the ppl I knew taking it. Actually, all I've heard is negative feedback. My nephew took it and it caused him many negative side effects so they kept changing it. Ever since then he's been different and depressed. Just do your research on the med., that's a tough one . Good luck

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