ex husbands fiance is mean to my son

Laura - posted on 07/17/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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my ex husbands fiancé is mean to my son behind his dads back my son is 8 and does not like to go to their house I have to make him go there. He came home crying because she is mean to him. His dad thinks tyler is lying and recently want him to come over to question him about it in front of the fiancé I said absolutely not!! what to do?

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Anita - posted on 07/17/2013

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I'd allow that on condition you were there to it would not be fair to question him with out you but it is wrong for this woman to get away with being mean your son should not feel that he doesn't want to be around his dad because of her maybe your ex could take him out and have quality time just the two of them

Jodi - posted on 07/17/2013

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Have you talked to his dad about these specific things and trying to resolve them? I'd hardly say that putting him in time out is being mean - he may have done something to deserve it. You can't believe your child is a total angel and never does any wrong over there. But her kids calling his dad daddy and his dad "losing interest" in him are not step mother's fault. These are his dad's issues.

Laura - posted on 07/17/2013

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I chatted with him and he says that she stares at him always puts him in time out told him he was annoying her he says when he brings toys over she makes him put them up cause it's not fair to her kids and her kids call his dad their daddy and it hurts tylers feelings and his dad has lost interest in tyler since he started dating his fiancé.

Jodi - posted on 07/17/2013

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I hate to tell you, but your son "could" be lying. My step son went home to his mum at around that age and told his mother I was hitting him. Well, you can imagine how upsetting this was to me. My husband 100% backed me, because I don't even spank my own children, as if I'd do it to his.

When we got to the bottom of it, he was actually trying to get out of coming to our house for a few weeks because there was something else happening that he was worried he'd miss out on, and he was too scared to tell the truth. Telling the truth would have upset his dad, whereas upsetting me was a much less emotionally distressing option for the poor kid.

I think you need to talk to your son a little more and find out some more specifics. Sometimes, when it comes down to it, it may only be because she is enforcing the rules of the house and implementing some consequences, or it may just be a smokescreen for something else. You can't just take what he says at face value without doing investigations of your own. Have a chat to him, and then let dad have a chat to him, then take it from there.

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