Elizabeth (Mona) - posted on 04/16/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )
I have been separated for seven months from a man I was with for eight years. When I met him he had a four year old, a nine year old and a 12 year old. The oldest is now 20 and we still chat. The nine year old is 16/17 and we chat now and then and the youngest is 12 and I have been denied communication which I am honoring. My ex has told me not to contact either of the two younger "children" but I still maintain contact with the 16/17 year old. He has told me that I am no longer family and I have no business being a part of their lives. It really hurts that he has done this. I still talk to the older child because he is old enough to decide for himself. I respected his restriction on the 12 year old because technically he is in the courts eyes too young to make that choice (even though he himself still would like to be able to chat with me) and my ex and I have a toddler together so I am trying not to step on toes (sort of). I believe he is doing this out of anger though I also believe he truly does believe I should not have anything to do with them now that we are separated. I feel at a loss with this and I worry I will lose the relationship the 12 year old and I have by the time he is old enough to decide for himself or his dad is not so angry. Just looking for thoughts on the topic of ex's and step children.