Kimberley - posted on 11/25/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )
Dear Moms, I'm a single mom (48 years old) of a 5 year old girl. I'M EXHAUSTED. I have no family to help out, and so far my daughters friends parents never offer for her to come and do a playdate at their house or watch her. I have hosted playdates many times, and I'm a single parent. I've had pneumonia twice in the last two years, need a hip replacement within a year (pain!), just getting over pertussis (although vaccinated for it when I was pregant)---Just deeply to the core worn out! My daughter is very energetic, animated, fun, musical, and verbal. She however does not listen to instructions or directions from me or her kindergarten teacher. It's getting worse each week. I'm finding myself exploding with anger after telling her 5 times + that it is NOW time to get clothes off and get in the shower. I know she is exhausted after a FULL day ( I work until 5:30 and pick her up at 6:00 3 days per week), but she seems to talk NON-STOP to herself and totally tune out me or anyone in authority giving her instructions.
O.k.--so maybe some of this is normal for her age. But I AM NOT HANDLING it well at all. I'm so exhausted, and my wick for exploding does not even exist. After asking her many times to do something close up and in her face and calmly. After asking her at least 3 times, I try to walk away, and breathe to calm myself down, but I end up not able to wait more than a few minutes before exploding and yelling at her or taking a toy away, which causes a GIGANTIC drama of her crying hysterically. I try to hold and calm her, she only pushes me away. I try to sit and listen quietly until I'm maxed out of her screaming and painfully crying (it's not just an act, she is really deeply sad.) I then feel my anger rising fast again, and then tell her enough is enough and she must get in the shower now. (by the way, she knows what to do and how.) I'm asking for help!!!! I don't have money for therapy. I am so so incredibly exhausted and yet I know I need help regulating my anger at her non-compliance of many things, in the morning and at night. I absolutely hate myself for yelling at her, for any spankings Iver given her, for handling her too strongly to guide her into her timeouts or into the shower. I've been to rough, and it is so not ME. I've lost respect for myself, and feel like a HORRIFIC mother. PLEASE HELP. Thank you!
P.S. I've tried time-outs, light butt spankings, taking away puff balls, toys, etc. All just leaves us both deeply sad and angry, and does not work.
BTW She sleeps 10-11 hours per night.