Family & Boundaries

Cecilia - posted on 02/24/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )




What would you do if a family member insisted on visiting after you repeatedly said it wasn't a good time but insists to come no matter what you say and how it inconvenienced you and your family and boundaries ???

This person had asked to come to visit me and my kids I said I and my husband would be working the entire time the whole days she would like to visit I don't have a big place I have a 2 bedroom apartment at the moment, also I have hired a sitter to watch my kids and that would mean she wouldn't get paid and she is an older lady who lives on social security I wouldn't want to tell her you don't get paid one week because I don't need you it's not fair to her. Also this person does not respect my husband and continues to blame him for so many things and yet she wants to stay here with us I made a compromise after we had moved into a house that I would invite her out to visit and I could plan ahead and take days off work for her, she still refused and insists on buying a plane ticket and then has the audacity to ask me if I will pick her up at the airport ?

I don't know what to do I have tried to reason with her and compromise but she still insists and I almost want to say something like if you come don't expect to have a relationship with me or my kids it's really stressing me out please advise


Dove - posted on 02/24/2013




Give her the number of a nearby hotel and car rental place.... and tell her to have a nice trip. Maybe your family could arrange to meet her at a local restaurant for dinner one night. At dinner you can apologize for not having more time for her, but if she had waited to make her trip at a time that would've worked for your family.... perhaps it would have been a different visit.

You've already told her it's not a good time and if she can't respect that.... her plans aren't your problem. ;)

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