father-less child

Ntsantso - posted on 11/26/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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good evening moms, i have a problem that is waking me up at night. i am 25 years old and i just discovered i am 4 months pregnant. i have been nervous about it and when i told my boyfriend he told me that he cant possibly be the father, and that if he truly is the father i must abort the child cause he is not ready to be a father. i find that i get scared that my child will ask me about him one day and i wont be able to answer. I'm not sure if i should pretend he is non existed in our lives or let my child know about their father who refused the responsibility.

your assistance and response will be greatly appreciated

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[momoftwo] - posted on 11/26/2013

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You never know he could come around once the baby is born but never abort especially if you dont want to. He needs to man up because he obviously didn't take the right precautions to make sure pregnancy wouldn't have happened in the first place. And stuff like this happens all the time it is a tough subject when your kids approach you on it. You can do it on your own though, and who knows if this guy were to all of a sudden take off then chances are you'd find a guy who could be an amazing father figure.

I'm with a guy who is the father of my second child but not my first and I swear she loves him more than her biological one. I have not once said anything bad about her dad to her or infront of her but she is catching on to how much he doesn't see her. All I can do is just tell her that he does love her a lot and he tries to see her as much as he can but he works.
It is hard though but every child is different they all react differently.

*the real story is I was 16 when I got pregnant, he wanted me to abort and I didn't, we ended up moving to his parents and after she turned a year old he left us. I stayed with his parents and he popped in and out of her life all the time. He will see her once or twice a month. After I moved out with her I let the grandparents have her every second weekend because they've been in her life from the start. She's 5 now and her father will take her rarely for a night once in a blue moon. I met the guy im with now 2 and a half years ago and she loves him to death it's awesome.

A lot of guys reactions are "get an abortion" but it's easier said than done. I've never had them because I'm against them but I know how they do them too so it's so much more disgusting when a guy says it. It's like manslaughter but legal if that sorta makes sense?

Men are always going to come and go but that baby will be your best friend forever. You never know either... That could be your only chance to have a baby.

Enna - posted on 11/26/2013

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I would tell the truth. Your boyfriend will hopefully come to his senses at some point and want to be a part of the child's life.

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