Father of my baby question???

Julesgulie - posted on 05/19/2016 ( 11 moms have responded )

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At first I was sure it was guy A's but now I'm having second guesses. The first day of my last period was january 2 and i usually have 27/28 day cycles and remember i could feel myself about to ovulate on the 14th. Was seeing guy A for a couple weeks late december/january, (who is now my boyfriend) and had sex almost everyday including the 11, 12, 13, and 14th (morning). guy A and i were only technically "official" after dating for 3 weeks and I caved in from my ex texting me and went over to his house and ending up having drunk sex. we had sex twice, night and morning, and he pulled out both times. This was the night of the 14/15. Then had sex with guy A the 15 , 16, and 17. Guy A never pulled out. Is it too close to tell? I have a hunch it is my boyfriends and my ex always used to wear a condom and was very careful about protection during sex, i assumed he just didn't have a condom the night i saw him.

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Ev - posted on 05/19/2016

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Molly--not prissy at all really. We do see a lot of this same question from a lot of women.

My answer goes with the agreement that the others have told you true. Having more than one partner that close together having sex can mean either one could be the dad. There is not way it could be the first guy because he and the other one were having sex with you so close together. If it had been several months apart....then you could be sure it was one or the other. And I am not sure that Guy A should even consider being your guy anymore because you had sex with the ex.

Molly - posted on 05/19/2016

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i hate to sound prissy but-- you had sex why a guy one morning and a different guy that same night? drunk or not--wow.

Dove - posted on 05/19/2016

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There are only two ways to know the paternity for sure... be completely monogamous or get a DNA test when the baby is born. Since you chose to not go for the first option you are left w/ only the second.

Sarah - posted on 05/19/2016

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There is no answer until the baby arrives and you get a DNA test in the hospital, right away. Do NOT name one man on the BC unless you have proof he is the father.
I here stuff like this from my students! There they stand with a positive pregnancy test, baffled "cause he pulled out"! Pre-ejaculatory fluid can have sperm in it! So pulling out is never a safe choice. Sperm can live up to five days in your body! You have overlapping sexual encounters so you will not know for sure until the baby arrives.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 05/20/2016

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Molly, not prissy at all. It just seems that some have very, very loose ideas of "morality" and "faithfulness".

Even before I was married, I couldn't bring myself to be in multiple relationships (drunk sex or not)...and speaking of "drunk sex"...since when did that start becoming an excuse? It used to be that one was ashamed of themselves for their abysmal behaviour wilst inebriated, but now it's bragging rights?

Sarah - posted on 05/19/2016

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As a young Catholic woman, Molly, I see your point. While I don't know your private details your posts sound like you were devoted to the man you married from a very young age. Nothing wrong with that at all, but here, we try to be open minded and offer advice no matter the circumstance. You're fine. You be you. You will find posts you find surprising and even shocking; you don't have to reply.

Michelle - posted on 05/19/2016

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Not prissy Molly, Like Evelyn said, this is a common question, along with the "Am I pregnant" questions. It's amazing how people will ask complete strangers behind a computer things that they can easily take a test for.

To the OP, like the others have said, get a DNA test done.

Molly - posted on 05/19/2016

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for real? maybe i am out of my league here. good luck because i have no idea what to say to you.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 05/19/2016

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Ok, honestly? NO ONE HERE CAN TELL YOU!!!

Why? Because: 1) We are NOT phyisicans. 2) We are not psychics 3) You had unprotected sex in a short period of time with multiple partners. Pulling out is NOT birth control.

In order to determine paternity, you’ll need to have both submit DNA and test it against the baby’s.

Raye - posted on 05/19/2016

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There's no way to tell except for a DNA test after the child is born.

Pulling out is not effective birth control. Especially if he was drinking, he may not have been exactly timely about it. And if you have sex multiples times, there could still be sperm in the urethra when you go at it again. So... hopefully you have learned your lesson about sleeping around and not being very careful about protection.

If you hope it's your current boyfriend, then have him tested first. If the baby is not his, then you're in a sticky situation with your ex.

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