FATHERHOOD

Maria - posted on 03/26/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I would just honestly like your opionions and that's it dnt wana read no bullshit..bascially I have a 2 year old going to be 3 this year november and when I got pregnant it wasn't planned but she is a true blessing from god I didn't really know her dad at the time as we just started seing eachother not sex just going out what not.. When she was born my patner her dad was a very good dad stepped up to the mark done his job ever since then I've had some doubts.. I spoke to him the other day and mentioned about having another child he said he wants to have another child when he has more money OK that's cool.. Wants to save from his job No problem but the question I want an answer to is why does he sleep with me with no protection as we have Never used protection as previously I was on the depo when my child was born and came of ov it last year due to really bad side effects and has told him I've come of the injection straight he was ok with it but the main question is he says he doesn't want another child but he doesn't want to use protection... I had a pregnancy scare not to long ago and he gave me this look (sad look) and I said what's the matter and he said ow its because you've gotter go to hospital demanding I just needed his loving and convinced me to stay at home with him?? Wdf I'm confused

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Kelsey - posted on 03/26/2013

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Maybe he's the type of guy like my ex; he use to say "What ever happens; happens" Maybe he doesn't want another baby but he's not going to make the effort of preventing it. That way, if you end up pregnant, you'll both just do what you have to do.

I think you need to sit down with him and discuss if you both want another child or not at this time. If you both don't, then take some action of preventing pregnancy. If you both do, happy baby making. Make him give you a definite answer, because bring a child into this world intentionally is something you shouldn't be on the fence about. Writing a list of the pros and cons of having another baby could be a good approach with your man if he operates like that.

Jodi - posted on 03/27/2013

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Why are you having sex without protection? You are both responsible for birth control. You can't just blame him. Maybe he thought you organised something else when you came off the injection. Were you specific about him needing to use birth control? Or did you just assume that when you told him you came off the injection he would know that meant you had NO protection at all. Believe me, with men, you have to be very explicit and spell it out to them.

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Jodi - posted on 03/27/2013

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I still don't understand why you are putting the responsibility of birth control entirely on him. Seriously, if the guy has expressed to you he is not interested in another child, FFS stop having unprotected sex with him. Tell him to put on a damn condom.

Kelsey - posted on 03/27/2013

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Isn't there some options that you can do? Like condoms or Birth control? or even spermicide?

Maria - posted on 03/27/2013

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Thanks for the comments so far.. @ jodi
I've just never used condoms with him from the start and think yh I am taking part aswel as I could get pregnant but I just choose to be natural as possbile after coming of the depo I have said to him that I am not taking anything else as it doesn't agree with me and which was ok to him he understood and yes men can be funny about sex etc.. But at the same time me telling him straight I'm not on protection at all and then him having sex with me without protection isn't that a bit crazy that he just goes with the flow knowing he wants to save money personally I think that if he didn't want a baby that much he would stop sleeping with me.. It can go two ways he stays around and accepts that we both made another child or he can leave.. I carnt force him to do something he doesn't want to do but surely men are not as stupid as this

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