Fathers rights

Aimee - posted on 08/16/2014 ( 10 moms have responded )

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My son has his fathers last name and he signed the birth certificate. We were never married. Now he is threatening to take me to court because I have had to make difficult decisions about visitation.

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Sarah - posted on 08/17/2014

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If the baby's father signed the birth certificate then he is stating that he is the father. It then no longer matters if you are married at time of birth because you both are stating this other guy is the father. You will need to get a lawyer and set custody. When a father signs the birth certificate he now has the same rights as u do for that child.

Aimee - posted on 08/17/2014

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I went to a lawyer when my son was 2 and he told me that because I was legally married to my now ex husband when I gave birth, I have 100% legal custody and get to decide visitation and if I go to court to establish child support and court appointed visitation I lose my full custody. Now his dad is saying he's going to sue me and lie to a judge. He can be extreamly convincing at times and is a great manipulator. Plus he is white and I'm brown and we live in the Midwest which makes me fear my chances of winning even more if we get the wrong judge.

Michelle - posted on 08/17/2014

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Then you go to court and get it all set up properly. You get the courts to set visitation so he can't argue with you about it.
I'm surprised you didn't go through the court system when it all happened.

Aimee - posted on 08/16/2014

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When my son was 1 ( he is 6 now) his father dropped a methadone in our home. I had no idea he was eating pills. My son ate it and almost died. Department of child services let me keep my son on the condition that I kick his father out of the house. I'd say he's a danger. I allowed my son to have a relationship w him, but he stirs up trouble for my family by telling my son he doesn't have to listen to us. When I asked him nicely to get on same page as me he scoffed at me and took him to an amusement park after I told him he had been in trouble at school. When his father threatened to sue me he flat out told me he will lie to judge about the events of the day he ingested methadone. When the test results came back for my son 3 weeks after his hospital stay, child services sent us to be drug tested and his father tested positive for methadone. A drug that leaves your system in less than 3 weeks. I tested negative for every illegal substance. I didn't plan on taking away his visits, but when I tried to tell him that our son took SEVEN large kitchen knives to school and have one to another first grader and I couldn't trust him to hold up the discipline he deserved ( no cookies, candy, junk food, amusement parks, toys, ect.) he told me he was going to sue me and take him away. I was only taking one visit away and even offered to meet him somewhere to spend a few hours w our son. Now I can't let him see his dad at all for fear that he will not bring him back. He has tried that before.

Dove - posted on 08/16/2014

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None of the comments are showing up for me today, but... your son has a legal and moral right to a relationship w/ his father. It would have been smart for YOU to go to court right after his birth to get custody and visitations set up. If you have proof that your ex is a danger to his son you can push for supervised visitations... but legally and morally... they DO have a right to a relationship. Period.

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