Feedback on how to make time for self and save relationship?

[deleted account] ( 1 mom has responded )

My bf and I moved out of state while I was pregnant so he could pursue his dream job (still in progress). I am currently not working (crossing fingers to land a job) yet I still can't manage to find the time to take care of myself on top of my 6 month old son and house work. I am exhausted and frustrated! My bf, who don't get me wrong is a great dad, isn't much help to me. I prefer to do the housework myself since whenever he attempts to it ends up being half ass. I am the one who wakes up in the night and early every morning, does the feeding, bathing, I feel like he really only helps out when it comes to playing. I've asked him many times if we could take turns on different days but he said it's my job, I'm his mom. Really? Very rarely is he the one to wake up with him. It's hard for me because I don't have any family or friends around to lend a helping hand. I guess I'm just looking for some advice on how to juggle all of this! I feel like I'm letting myself go and my relationship is heading south.


Michelle - posted on 01/14/2013




You need to discuss it with him how you are feeling. Tell him you are overwhelmed and can't get everything done and would like some help. If he says that's your job, maybe remind him that we aren't living in the 50's anymore and you would like your son to grow up thinking it's normal for a Father to actually help out around the home. You would like your son to know how to do the everyday chores and it would help if he saw his father doing these things.

If all that fails then get into some marriage counseling before it's too late. Maybe he needs an outsider to tell him how much he is expecting from you and giving anything in return. A partnership is just that, you are equal partners and you should help each other in every aspect.

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