feel on an all time low

Carina Heather - posted on 08/18/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I'm very new to this, a few months ago I would of never thought id be signing up and ranting about my life but here goes...

I have 3 boys 2,4 & 6.. I've been married almost 3 years but with my partner 4 and a half, we met when my 1st was 2 & my 2nd child was 5 months, id separated from their dad due to being cheated on, anyways I was on my own for over a year and whilst pregnant with my second before meeting my now husband (gosh that sounds confusing) after a rough few years before I was fresh and ready for my new relationship, started off perfect but soon I started to realise his bad faults like constantly going out drinking and letting me and my children down, he would then apologise and tell me he would stop it but it continued for 4 years on and off. We've had a lot of good times but they were soon overruled by the bad. These past 6 months I've felt so invisible (he works away then when he's back it wont be any more than a day or so until he's down the pub with friends( sometimes not coming home, he would stay at a friends house. I then had a gut instinct he was doing drugs because he started to look different as well as act different, he denied it, friends denied it until, I hacked into his facebook. Very unlike me. But I found out my suspicion's were true. I split with him and at the moment I'm very much on my own, I have one friend who at the moment has started a new relationship so I rarely hear from her, he is nice one minute but then he will snap the next threatening I must leave hos mortgaged house (which I refused to put my name on due to a number of reasons ) he's taking his daughter from a past relationship abroad tomorrow (I feel its hin being spiteful to me but hey ho) I'm having to claim income support etc due to him taking my name off the joint account since we split & I'm on now on the council list which doesn't seem to be doing much. I'm sorry for the rant,I feel angry, sad, worthless and just on an all time low at the moment, my three boys are keeping me grounded and very busy but I just cant shake this hopeless feeling. Has anyone been through the same? I've fought so hard for us to work but he's chucked it on my face constantly. I just don't know what to do anymore.. Sorry to bore you all xx

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/18/2015

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What you need to do, immediately, if you haven't already, is get an emergency custody order for your youngest (I'm assuming it's his?), as well as support orders in place for that child. You do have support for the other two, right? If not, it's time to get that man on support as well.

Look for an attorney/solicitor that may be able to help you on a sliding fee scale, or for low payments.

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Carina Heather - posted on 08/24/2015

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Thankyou for both your advice. I'm on the list for housing as I'm studying at the moment so have no money for private rented accomodation, wish it was that easy but it isn't. He'd never try and take my son so there isn't any reason to file for custody really ?!

Raye - posted on 08/19/2015

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Your husband is not going to get better, because he doesn't feel like he's doing anything wrong. It's a bad situation. If you're living in his house, then find a new place to live. Begin divorce proceedings, and get custody, visitation and child support worked out through the courts.

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