Erika - posted on 08/17/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )
I am 25 and almost 7 weeks pregnant with my first child. I'm not married but my boyfriend is extremely supportive and I think is looking to propose which I am happy about. However.. I feel very alone right now. I will be so excited about this baby one minute and then completely panicked the next. I'll be sitting in a restaurant and suddenly realize I'm going to have to always have a baby in tow. I've always been in love with babies ever since I was a toddler and I am a great babysitter. I couldn't wait to have kids. Now that it's happening sometimes I really don't want it. My boyfriend works out of town a lot and I am college and will be alone a lot. I don't really feel adoption or abortion is an option for me. Sometimes I love my baby.. sometimes I dont. I feel horribly guilty about these feelings. It seems every time I feel unhappy about this pregnancy is when I feel sick. Which is a lot. I feel like I cant live like this for another 7 some months... My family is Catholic and I'm afraid they will shun me. My parents won't but my grandmother and aunts and cousins might. My mother is making me feel like this is so wrong but I need her to be happy for me. Why do I keep changing my mind about how I feel about this baby? My boyfriend doesn't understand what it's like to be pregnant and my friends with kids have never felt this way. Help?