first time mom

Cheyenne - posted on 01/30/2015 ( 21 moms have responded )

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Hi, I'm new. I recently found out I was pregnant and in almost thirteen weeks I can't afford much and I'm trying to get my own place with my boyfriend. So that isn't leaving much money for our first ultrasound and I'm trying to start getting prepared we don't know what we are having yet, and I'm only 18 he's 20 and we just were hoping for some help getting things started. If you have things that are for not or girl, like can be used for either one it would be greatly appreciated. I live in pa so it'll be easier if ppl live close. Thank again.

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Keely - posted on 02/03/2015

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Please contact a group called Nurse Family Partnership, it is free and voluntary , it is also compltely private. They have tons of resources and will teach you everything you need to know about being a great mom! They are generally through your local Health Department and if you have medicaid or WIC you automatically qualify for services. They are registered nurses who come to your home and assess you and your pregnancy so you stay healthy and know about what changes your body will go through, They will follow you through your pregnancy and birth/postpartum. Than they stay with you until the baby is 2 yrs. old and teach you to teach your child language, discipline, reading, playing. And they help you go to school or get a job/training. They are a wonderful group...

Keely - posted on 02/03/2015

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Visit your pregnancy resource center and your local health department for a Parent Pro or Nurse Family Partnership program in your area. They have really good resources for all your supplies. Also if you will volunteer at your local Goodwill Store they pay you in baby items like, strollers, beds etc. There a good deal of programs out there for first time moms.. Don't be afraid to utilize those and remember that garage sales and thrift stores are a great way of picking things up and keep your budget. Contact DHS because your first ultrasound is paid for by them if you qualify for assistance with your baby..

Trisha - posted on 02/03/2015

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Cheyenne, like I mentioned before. Don't worry about the baby stuff. Everyone is just concerned that you are not going to be able to get the proper prenatal care for the baby.
Have you gone on prenatal vitamins yet? I went on them 6 months prior to getting pregnant, and am still on them, (6 months into pregnancy).

Sarah - posted on 02/02/2015

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Like I said before regarding the health cost; be an adult, ask to speak to the finance manger of the practice that is near to you. If you explain that you have a PPO or HMO plan but you are not able to get to the in-network providers, they most likely will be willing to work with you regarding the fees.
My interest in responding is to help you get prenatal care for your baby and yourself. You can't assume they will not help you. You'd be surprised how many doctors will waive their fee, or offer a sliding scale.

Dove - posted on 02/02/2015

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Technically your OP is soliciting... which is not allowed here. We're just trying to help you realize that these are things you NEED to deal with and deal with as soon as possible.

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Sarah - posted on 02/03/2015

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Cheyenne you asked for baby stuff. You were given advice on how to get baby items and you dismissed some of them without making an effort. Churches will not slam the door in your face. The Dept of Human Services will have advice for food, housing and healthcare. I gave good advice for managing your healthcare costs.
Disclose your secret to your family, whether you think they will support you or not, you have to tell them.

Cheyenne - posted on 02/02/2015

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I'm sorry I came on here for help not for people to bully me. I'm trying the best I can , I've considered adoption my boyfriend said no. And so if I can't get encouraging feedback or help than please do not comment on here because the last stress I need is from someone calling me a child and not going through the rest of the comments to read that I am with him in his moms house. I am aware of how much every thing is going to cost and that with my crappy jon its hard to afford a car that will get me to places that I will be able to get a better job I know what position in in I not proud of myself and I'm tired of having people tell me that I need to get my act together swallow my pride, I'm like any other teen trying to get there act together and I'm in a position where I have a child on the way now. So do not sit here and tell me what I am and a child is not one of them

~♥Little Miss - posted on 02/02/2015

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We all have the same interest Sarah, but in order for that to happen, she needs to grow up. Stop waiting for others to do everything for her. Take responsibility.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 02/02/2015

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Well you are being a child. Find a way to get to the offices that your insurance covers. You have NO IDEA the expense during pregnancy, birthing, and after. Get it done and stop making excuses. Who are you living with right now?

Cheyenne - posted on 02/02/2015

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I have a job so does he we don't have transportation and my insurance only covers certain places that I can't reach right now I will tell my family but its not a pride thing its a family issue that they will shut me out right now if i tell them

Sarah - posted on 02/02/2015

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To say that a church will not help you because they are against teen pregnancy is absurd. You said you are insured but your doctor does not accept your insurance, then call your insurance company for a referral to a doctor that does take your insurance. What kind of health insurance do you have? If you sit down with the finance manger at the doctor's office and explain your problem they may we willing to accept the out-of-network benefits you do have. This is a matter of you putting your pride aside and asking for help. Do you have public transportation?

Dove - posted on 02/02/2015

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Baby stuff is really the least of your concerns right now. Babies don't technically NEED much in the way of material possessions. The medical care, transportation, income for life survival... these are the things to focus on. You have internet access and I'm assuming you have a phone... that's all you need to find resources to help you sort out the big things. Baby stuff can wait a few more months.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 02/02/2015

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Get some government help, and some health insurance. If you are not getting proper medical care during your pregnancy, how are you going to be able to afford the actual delivery? You really should start telling your family so they can help you. Also, you should find a job and if your boyfriend doesn't have hone, he needs one also.

Trisha - posted on 02/02/2015

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From my experience, it is easy to get clothes and baby stuff from people. I am from a big city, but all I really had to do was put out a status on facebook saying "Hey, if anyone has any baby boy stuff they are looking to get rid of, send me a message and I can take it off your hands."
I got maternity jeans, and 3 boxes of baby stuff from just one person.
You will find a lot of people will be excited about your pregnancy and will be happy to help out.
Create a baby shower registry (you can even do these on amazon.ca/com).
I am with the other women who posted. Focus on prenatal care at this moment. Get on prenatal vitamins and start seeing your doctor to ensure that it is a healthy pregnancy. Don't worry about all the other stuff yet, until you are ready to tell people about the pregnancy. Best of luck and congratulations!

Sarah - posted on 01/30/2015

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You may have to make sacrifices if you want help then. You may need to let others know. You may need to eat your pride and ask churches for help. You may need to ask your friend to stop at the crisis pregnancy center when you go to doc. appts. Things only get harder after baby comes. You are going to have to figure out how to make things work with the resources you have available or you may want to look into adoption if you feel you are not able to provide for the baby at this time.

Cheyenne - posted on 01/30/2015

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I have a friend that was willing to take me to appointments until the car started working. And no one knows I'm pregnant yet and the churches near me are the type to be against teen pregnancy so I don't want to go there.
You are really helpful tho thank you.

Sarah - posted on 01/30/2015

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Local churches will also be a resource. Especially in small towns they tend to have more outreach resourses.

Sarah - posted on 01/30/2015

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You are best to go local than on an international website. You are not going to get much this way. If it is a small town and you don't have a car how are you getting to doctor appts? Also if they don't accept your insurance then you need to look into why that is and what to do to fix that. That would be your first priority instead of baby stuff right now.

Cheyenne - posted on 01/30/2015

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I do have insurance they said they don't except it though. And I don't have a local thing like that I've looked. I don't have a car its a small town and everything is walking distance. The one we gave isn't running. It just seems to be one mess after another.

Sarah - posted on 01/30/2015

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It would be better to go to your local crisis pregnancy center for help. Also if you don't have insurance then get on medicaid. There add should be no reason you need to pay for ultrasound if you have insurance or on medicaid.

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