Found a condom

Stew - posted on 05/29/2014 ( 10 moms have responded )




I'm very sorry, but I am actually a guy who really needed an opinion from some honest women/mums.

I'm going to try to keep this short. Im 31, my GF is 30. We've been together for 6 months. Recently I was looking for tweezers and I know she keeps some in her pink travel jewelry bag. I went to get some and found a condom in there. We don't use condoms and haven't for last 4 months. She also went away to Center Parcs for 4 nights recently with her girl friends and this bag was packed in her suitcase, I remember seeing it there before she left. This condom was same, make colour and brand that we used when we first met. I wasn't too bothered when I first found it as I put it down to being there from when we first met. But the more I thought about it, fact she went away with it, I don't know if it was or wasn't in there before and she mentioned cheating on one of her ex's in the past due to lack of attention in the relationship, made me question it slightly more. She does very lovely things for me all the time, we spend a lot of time together and she said she loves me. I haven't let on that I found it. She has often said that I'm taken now (as in I'm hers), that she doesnt want to think of me with anyone else, but it was suspicious what I found almost like it was specifically packed. So I wanted an honest opinion from a set of mums.

So my questions:

Am I overreacting?
Should I ask her about it in a non accusing way?
Do women clear out there bags like this?
What are peoples thoughts on this?


Lisa - posted on 05/29/2014




I would just say something innocent, smiling, giggling, like "I was using your tweezers and found this old thing - best we toss that seeing that we don't use them huh??" See how she reacts.


View replies by

Zoe - posted on 05/31/2014




If it really bothers you, you should ask. Having your mind plagued by curiosity won't make it easy for you to simply get over this incident. If you ask her about the condom, try not to sound accusatory either because you really don't know. if you think this is something you will get over, I can guarantee you she just forgot it.

Maria - posted on 05/30/2014




I say you talked to her. Be honest. If u don't you could be playing out so many scenarios, that could be so off. In the mean time ur feeling so much uncertainty about her commitment to you.
A relationship should have trust, if u don't trust her, is that a relationship you want to be in?

~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/29/2014




Well, first of all...I would not be having sex in a new relationship without a condom. Period. Totally irresponsible on both your parts. Cause guess what? If she is indeed cheating, maybe she just gave you an std.

Talk to her. Ask her for crying out loud.

Jodi - posted on 05/29/2014




Have you considered that maybe she just hasn't gotten around to taking it out? It sounds to me that you are overreacting. Why are you going through her stuff anyway?

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 05/29/2014




Generally a person who reacts in such a manner can be seen as being the one who's cheating.

Were you my partner, I'd wonder why you felt it necessary to enter my 'domain'. I would consider it an invasion of my privacy, to be quite honest, in that you did not feel the need to ask me permission to dig through my bag. I don't care if it's makeup, clothing, or purse, it's mine. I don't dig through your wallet, you don't dig through my bag.

Not that I'd be hiding anything, but it's a respect thing. You didn't respect her enough to say "hey, I'm looking for tweezers, mind if I check your bag".

As far as how often we clear out our bags...well, it could be YEARS. I have some travel bags that still have some little thing or another in them, left over after another trip. The likelyhood of the condom you found being one of the ones y'all stopped using is very high, and you're over reacting.

Gena - posted on 05/29/2014




Ask her nicely,tell her you saw it and you are wondering if she packed it or not.I could imagine that she just had it in there because you were using those ones.I have handbags that i clean out after not using them for a year or so,and i find alot of stuff in them..wouldnt surprise me if i still had a condom in one of them after such a long time.

Pam - posted on 05/29/2014




It's probably been there for ages and she forgot about it. I've done this before. don't sweat it.

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