Future Mother In Law ???

Kezia - posted on 07/01/2016 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Hello! I am new to this. Looking to connect with other mothers (married and unmarried)! Seeking opinions of others besides friends and family. So I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 years now. We have a 2 year old son together. But I cannot stand his mother and she cannot stand me. She has disrespected our relationship in many ways bu constantly mentioning his ex girlfriends to him. She makes it her business to constantly inform him of what they post on their Facebook. Sad to say but I don't even trust her with my son .. what really gets me is that my boyfriend never stands up to his mother. Instead he will flip on me. Any one experience this??

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Kassandra - posted on 07/11/2016

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Hi Kezia, did you get a chance to look at these articles? Were they helpful?

Kassandra - posted on 07/04/2016

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Since you mentioned that you are open to advice, I want to share a couple of articles that might help you figure out how to handle both the situation with your boyfriend and the situation with his mom. This first one talks about the importance of your boyfriend being supportive http://bit.ly/1Py3uoC and this one is an article on dealing with MIL's http://bit.ly/29tVUfc. Even though these articles are not exactly your same situation, they have some helpful tips in how to handle relationship conflicts like these. I hope they will be helpful. Let me know what you think.

Kezia - posted on 07/03/2016

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He does not think that anything his mother does is wrong or disrespectful. He always finds a way to blame it on me or flip the situation around on me. If he ever does say she was wrong, he will never address her and tell her that she was out of line. He'll tell me that he would but months later ill come to find out that he didn't. But yet he has no problem flipping on me. Its pretty sad actually. I've had to go out of my way numerous times and address her and I feel like it is not my place to do so.

Kassandra - posted on 07/02/2016

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Hi Kezia. This is a tough position to be in. If I am reading this correctly, it sounds like you have had a conversation(s) with your boyfriend about how it makes you feel when his mom is disrespectful and he gets upset with you about this. Does he agree that there is a problem and he just doesn't want to deal with it or does he think there is no problem with his mom's actions?

Kezia - posted on 07/01/2016

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She's just so dramatic. In my opinion, she is way too old for the drama that comes with her. She is constantly running her mouth and stirs up mess and confusion. Especially in my relationship. I don't know if she realizes that her son is now a grown man with a family and what goes on in our relationship/household does not concern her.

Sarah - posted on 07/01/2016

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I am fortunate to get along just fine with my MIL, but my sister shares your troubles. If he doesn't back you now, he likely never will. My advice is either find a way to get along or just accept it. What is it about her that you don't like? Life is short, and you can't change how she feels about you but you can change the way you feel about her.

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