Going to school

Kimm - posted on 11/09/2015 ( 14 moms have responded )

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My 11 year old son wants me to home school him. He says he hates school ! I encourage him everyday. I take him to and from school Mon. thru Fri. I'm not sure what to say to him to have a better outlook. I have addressed all his frustrations, fears, questions, and potential problems with school. I am so stuck !! I have talked to the school counselor, principal, his family physician, and a child psychologist ( after he told us he wanted to try suicide). When he gets upset and crying so do I !!! This is tough. What do I say & do..??

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Jodi - posted on 11/11/2015

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"Someone might have sexually abused him in school they will not day.I know this happens in school bathrooms. "

OMG, seriously? This happens so rarely that it bothers me you just make this assumption before actually knowing WHY he wants to be homeschooled.

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Chris - posted on 11/12/2015

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My 12 year old son was having many of the same issues last year. It turned out that one of the teachers aids was verbally attacking him. Check out what's going on at that school. If your child wants you there it could be for a reason. Good luck to you u hope it's something simple.

Sarah - posted on 11/11/2015

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Homeschooling is not a magic solution. If your child has mental health issues, then those are not going to be fixed by homeschooling him.

Kimm - posted on 11/11/2015

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I have made a few rules, and changed some of our routines around the house. My son is feeling much better. Thou I'm still going to watch him & make sure he's aware that the new "rules" & "routines" are followed. He has a new direction to go. Let me clear the air for anyone who replied to my post !....1) My son has NOT been violated in anyway ! ...2) The bullying has stopped for now ! My son and the bully-er have made up and eat lunch together. 3) All involved with his mentioning suicide have agreed...his intentions are low and were expressed out of anger & frustration ! ( Now that doesn't mean I'm going to just blow this off and forget about it !!!!! ) As far as home schooling...we are just not there yet. It's still an option, but not now !

Dove - posted on 11/11/2015

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My teenage daughters have always been in public school. Their best friend is home schooled... There are NO noticeable differences between them.

Home schooling is not the answer for every family and if a child is talking about killing themselves... home schooling is NOT going to completely solve that. Home schooling might help in some ways, but to advise this mother to not seek professional help for her child is doing a HUGE disservice to him, Liz. You obviously have very little understanding of true mental health issues.

Raye - posted on 11/11/2015

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Liz, it's not always a good difference to be homeschooled. The child could be too isolated and not have necessary social skills to be a productive member of society. Sorry, but God will not provide all if she quits her job to homeschool. She will have to find assistance with income (she may not qualify if quitting her job voluntarily). There's a lot more that goes into a decision like that than just because a child wants that. And that still may not alleviate his fears. He needs professional help.

Kimm, your child should definitely talk to counselors to find out what is at the heart of his anxiety and talk of suicide. You can't do it all yourself.

Liz - posted on 11/11/2015

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Someone might have sexually abused him in school they will not day.I know this happens in school bathrooms. People, don't think everyone in the world is good! There is bad thing s that happen !!!!!really!!! Most peoples answer therapy, doctors, and prescribed DRUGS! But ultimately your child is God gift to YOU! And is YOUR responsibility. If he does commit suicide you will regret not listening and protecting him like he wanted you to. It's a short time. Even if he didn't homeschooling is one of the most rewarding experiences and children are so much more sociable and more likely to reach their goals by FAR! The should be a homeschooling group near you ask how they do it, you will be surprised when you meet those children the is an Obvious difference from homeschooled children, and it's a good difference.

Liz - posted on 11/11/2015

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I'm guessing you love your child, you only get to have him about 7 more years with you. Homeschool. You can. If you have to wait your job then quit your job his life depends on it.I promise God will provide all you needeth

Sarah - posted on 11/09/2015

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I agree with the previous posts. You need to make clear to him that homeschooling is not an option and then find him the help he needs? Is he being bullied? does he have a learning disability? Why does he hate school? If he is truly suicidal he needs emergent treatment, tonight. Why do YOU think he wants to be home-schooled?

Dove - posted on 11/09/2015

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If he has threatened to kill himself he needs to be in therapy. He NEEDS help.

I have kids that hate school and want to be home schooled, so they don't have to go... 3 of them actually... lol Home schooling is not an option for us and not going to school is not an option for them... so they deal w/ it.

If your son can NOT deal w/ it... he needs professional help constantly at the very least until he CAN deal w/ it (if not continuous for the rest of his life).

Raye - posted on 11/09/2015

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Somehow, you're making him believe that it's a negotiation. You have to let him know it's not an option, so he needs to work out these issues. He needs to talk to a counselor. He needs to talk to a doctor. Whatever these fears and anxiety are about, needs to be conquered by HIM putting forth the effort (and possible medication), not just you trying to do it for him.

Jodi - posted on 11/09/2015

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I got the part where he wants your to home school him. I also got the part where YOU spoke to a counsellor, the principal, the child psychologist, etc. but has HE spoken to these people? You can't tell me that he spoke about suicide and the only person he spoke to is you and you've not taken that further.

Why doesn't he like school? That's the real question here too. Kids don't talk suicide about just not liking school. There's usually more to it.

Kimm - posted on 11/09/2015

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He wants me to home school him. When he mentioned suicide I got him to speak to me. In 1 day I talked to 4 people. The doctor got him some help with sleeping issues. The principal wants to see him 1st thing before classes start to help with his fears. The teachers have gave him extra time to ease anxiety about classwork. I'm always positive with him. He just wants me to home school him, cuz he doesn't like school !

Jodi - posted on 11/09/2015

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Has HE talked to the counsellor or doctor? You say you've addressed all his frustrations, fears, questions, but clearly you have not if he is still upset. And if he has said he wants to suicide, that indicates deeper problems that should be addressed with the counsellor and doctor. Do you know WHY he feels this way?

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