Grandparent dealing with grandson living with other grandparent

Kate - posted on 12/09/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I am a grandparent who has had to deal with my grandson living with his other grandparent. We are two different people all together and I have little say in anything other then what I have had to go to court to get. Any others out there dealing with the same thing ?

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Raye - posted on 12/09/2015

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If you have court orders, then abide by them. If the other side of the family is not abiding by them, bring them up on charges of contempt. Continue to be loving and supportive of your grandson, and help him learn how to make his way in the world. That's the best you can do. Is it fair? Probably not. But how much of life is fair. Apparently, the child's parents made bad choices, if the child is being raised by a grandparent. And that's not fair to the child either. You all should stop thinking of yourselves, and try to do what's in the best interests of the child. And enjoy the time you do get to spend with him.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/09/2015

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At this point, if the other grandparent has custody, you have to live with it. If you've been able to get access though court via grandparent's rights, you actually have it better than quite a few I know.

Generally, though, a non custodial grandparent isn't going to have any say in ANY type of upbringing, and that wouldnt' change if the child was with their biological parents.

Not knowing the situation, and not really wanting to know, I have to say that you are lucky to have what you have. If you truly feel that the child is in danger with the custodial living arrangments in place, then by all means document everything and go back to court. However, if you're just not happy because (for example) your son in law's parents got custody over you (or whatever), don't waste time on trivial accusations that aren't going to benefit anyone.

You also have to keep in mind that the custodial instructions for the child may not have been to your agreement...but then again, they weren't yours to make in the first place. I understand that this is a harsh approach, but in reality, sometimes one must take the hand they are dealt.

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