Guardianship problems

Jessica - posted on 03/17/2013 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I am a mother of two boys that are in the guardianship of my older sister. My boyfriend and I (the biological father) were having trouble in our relationship about a year and a half ago and I decided to leave, we both decided to assign her guardian while we figured out living situations and custody. The children had been with her for about four months when me and the father reconciled and decided it was better for everyone to be together as a family and work out any problems we had. We got an apartment maybe five miles from my sisters home and asked her to allow us to have the kids over for a visit she protested saying that it is to confusing for them and did not think it was a good idea. We did not fight with her we just asked what she thought was best and she allowed us to see the kids for three hours a day on two seperate days in her home under her watch. It has now been almost a year and a half since being placed in her care and she is encouraging them to call her mom and her husband dad, I tried to correct this and she exploded on me and said i should respect the childrens right to call her mom. I think things have really gotten out of hand and it is affecting my children and i dont know what to do because we cant afford a lawyer and she will not give me my kids back. This whole thing is having an enormous effect on us emotionally and I fear she will never let them come home.

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Jessica - posted on 04/01/2013

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Our children are ages five and two, our oldest son says to us that he would like to come home and stay with us. Our youngest cannot voice his opinions yet but they both light up when they see us. The only reason so far that we have gotten from her is that it would be to confusing for them to come home with us, tho she seems to be confusing them more by encouraging them to call her mom.

Danielle Elizabeth - posted on 04/01/2013

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How old are your kids? Are they old enough to voice their opinions about where they want to stay? I just hope that's what all the adults are aware of in the situation; what is best for the little ones. Does your sister give a reason why she refuses to give back custody? It sounds like she plans on keeping them if she insists on them calling her mom . It sounds like your going to have to come up with the cash for. a lawyer, and as long as she can't prove you to be an unfit parent I can't imagine a judge not allowing the children to be placed in the custody of the parents. Signing over any rights as a parent is a very slippery slop bc you never know what the guardian will do in the future. Id really like to know your sisters reasoning for not wanting the kids to come home
; especially if she agreed to keep them on a temporary basis to begin with

Jessica - posted on 04/01/2013

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we were fighting over who got the kids and that is why a guardianship agreement was put into place so that neither of us could run off with the kids, we both wanted them but could not agree on anything so my sister suggested the temporary guardianship until we went to court to get a custody agreement filed and figured out. In the process of all of that we reconciled and have been back together since.

Danielle Elizabeth - posted on 03/31/2013

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I kind of agree, I feel there is more to the story than you are saying. I don't see why one of you could not have made it possible to care for the children. If you are not in the position to be able to care for your children lets say if something ever again happened between you and your boyfriend maybe it is best for the kids to stay with your sister for the time being . If you did get custody back would you be able to have your kids if something did go wrong, bc if not that wouldn't be fair to the kids to be pushed back and forth depending on the status of your relationship

Jessica - posted on 03/17/2013

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The trouble with our relationship was that I started talking to an ex-boyfriend and moved out with the plan to take my children with me. Prior to the ex coming around our relationship was fine. The father could not take care of himself let alone two children after I left, and I had no income of my own so my sister got guardianship.

Amy - posted on 03/17/2013

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Most parents fight over who gets the kids, they don't usually give them to a relative. Without knowing the whole story (I feel like you left out some really important parts) it's really hard to give advice. But my suggestion if you really want your kids back is to get yourself to the courthouse first thing in the morning and find out what paperwork you need to file in order to get your kids back with you, the longer you let them stay there the harder it's going to be for you to get them back.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/17/2013

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I don't understand why one of their maternal parents did not step up to the plate and keep their own children. Why there had to be appointed a guardian in the first place is my initial concern. Why was it so bad for you to leave? And if it was so bad that your kids could not be exposed to the circumstances, how come you returned after such a short period of time?? And if it wasn't bad, how come neither of you wanted your own kids?? Sorry, to many gaps and not enough information to be at all helpful here.

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