Lorna - posted on 11/12/2012 ( no moms have responded yet )
I was wondering if anyone could help point me in the right direct. My Step-son shows challenging behaviour when he is at school and when he is at his birth mothers, however when he is in mine and my fiancee's house he seems like a 'normal' child.
The Challenging Behaviour Team have assessed him as a priority case and are keen to get him enrolled into a programme asap. He has only recently started a special needs primary school and has only turned aged 4. His birth mother has said that he is autistic but no confirmed diagnosis has been given, she treats him like a baby, still trying to send him to us in nappies, when he is quite capable of going to the toilet all by himself and even wash and dry his hands without any prompting.
It is mine and my fiancees views that its more emotional neglect causing the behavioural problems as his mother has mental health issues of her and has been hospitalised over these. She is extremely moody and lose her temper like a flick of a switch.
I would like to point out that my fiancee was not aware of his son's existence until his son was 2 and half years old... the relationship with his birth mother is some what strained as she is a compulsive liar and doesnt seem to show an interest in the child or his progress (i.e by not attending to therapy sessions due to her having a common cold).
When it comes to taking my step-son home, we are never sure if she will be in or if she will be late... She has made up in the past that she has been kept in hospital due to a toothache on a trip and being kept in overnight and has told us that she has got arrested on a separate occasion which both turned out to be lies.
I was wondering if you could direct me as to where i go to about raising concerns about the safety of my step-son in the care of his birth mother.. as social services are currently involved but they do not talk to my fiancee as he has only recently been granted parental responsibility by court order in the last three weeks....
We both do not want to annoy (when i say annoy, do anything that could jepordise our chances if/when my fiancee decides to go for full custody) social services but we have genuine concerns about the safety of the child.
I would be grateful for any advice that you could give me as, i am at my wits end not knowing where or what i should do for the best.