Hateful Adult Children

Linda - posted on 09/13/2016 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I swear my daughter just uses me all the time, The only time she wants to have anything to do with me is when it benefits her! And she uses my grand daughter against me , And I can not stand to keep seeing that sweet 3 year old baby cry to stay with me anymore! So should I just tell my daughter to get all her stuff and get out of my house? And stay away from me all together, Because right now I do not care if I ever see her again, All I want to see is my grand daughter! I am thinking of seeing if I can get visitation rights to her! What are your thoughts? Had it !

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Dove - posted on 09/14/2016

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She is living what she has learned... and it sounds like you are now throwing a fit like a toddler. By all means don't allow her to live in your home if she is not upholding her responsibilities as an adult member of the household, but to cut her completely out of your life when she is only behaving the way YOU have allowed? Seems extreme.

You need to set boundaries of respect for her to abide by... for sure, but to cut her out of your life or try and pursue visitation to the child through the courts...? Not the answer. Perhaps go to counseling to learn mature ways to handle conflict instead... and invite your daughter to come along on a few sessions.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/14/2016

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well, then, she is only responding as she has been trained to all her life...

Linda - posted on 09/14/2016

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Seems Like all of her life , only girl and the baby and I raised them alone with the help of my parents.

Sarah - posted on 09/13/2016

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People treat you the way you allow them to treat you. If you set some healthy boundaries, you may feel better. Going to court for grandparent visitation will be costly and ineffective. Those cases are usually when a parent of a grandchild is deceased and the living parent denies access to the other set of grandparents. If you daughter is living and posses no risk to the child, you will not win in litigation. You will only alienate your daughter and potentially never see your grandchild again.
How about trying some counseling?

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/13/2016

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How long have you been catering to her? She is exhibiting the behaviour that she learned.

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