Margaretw - posted on 11/19/2012 ( no moms have responded yet )
Im new to this site, my husband got me interested in it. Real brief history about my daughter. First, my current husband is my second marriage. We have been together for 8 years and married for 3. I have a 17 year old almost 18 year old from a previous marriage. She's been brainwashed since my divorce almost 11 years ago from my ex, she beleived the stories and accepted the hateful comments and names about me and now my husband up until about a year ago. Finally started to see the truth. She started 10th grade last year and started talking to this boy who was transferred from a different city to our school district. Their relationship started out normal but within a month, i could see things that were not 'normal' to me, the way he would talk to her, their FB convo's, just mothers intuition call it, it wasn't right. I questioned the mother, found out that he was adopted, had a rough time of it with being in and out of foster care, etc. His adoptive parents are his aunt and uncle. There was abuse going on in the household with his biological parents. I found out then from his aunt that he was bi-polar, manic depressive, and scixifranic (sp? -oh boy). Ok so now it all made sense from what i was reading with their convos and his what i thought were dramatic episodes. My daughter is a nurturer, did the same thing with her father, felt sorry for him, etc. Well, it got worse before better, he started talking in the third person, known as Jill, and it got worse. I wasn't comfortble, tried to talk to my daughter who is VERY naive, she wouldn't see it. It got really bad over the summer, we told her no more, you are done. Of course, we find out she has been lying to us since the relationship started. We talked to her about the lying, punished her for the lying, and so forth, to no avail. It finally ended with her starting to skip school with HIM, she got caught, after telling us it was over, again a lie for the the 100th time. I transferred her to a different school went thru the process of registering, hoping this was it. Found out last week, she was still communicting with him, showed up at her school. I was STILL giving my daughter the benefit of the doubt, she claimed she didn't tell him, i said well then he's stalking. I think we should file a PPO. We went to his parents house to confront them, who have not been an active part in this, they dont care, The dad went off on us, the boy lied, and my daughter defended them. She was furious with us because she again got busted for lying. My trust is gone. She is now living with her dad. It is the hardest thing i have had to do but she cant keep going on with this and playing us for fools. She started lying to my in laws, who were also helping with the school situation. I forgot to mention, the boy HATES me, almost to the point where i feel he's always watching. Pretty creepy kid.
I guess im feeling guilty, but then not. I have always been there for my daughter, and not being able to know if she is ok and it to end on such a terrible note is devasting. It's like a loss of a loved one.