Hello :) Looking on changing my son's bith certificate :)

Simona - posted on 03/27/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )

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The biological father and my had a relationship that was compromised from the beginning . I remained pragnent from the time I was still in high school and he "advised" me to abort if I didn't think that I am ready to be a mom ( let's face it , who is ?) and I refused .I could't bear the thought of taking someone's life....We are both from Romania but for the last year and 9 months I lived in the U.K. and I intend to live here for the rest of my life . I am a single parent . I gived birth to my son on 30.08.2012 at Barnsley Hospital. I made the huge mistake that the father's baby appears on his birth certificat so I gave my baby his surname . After the baby was born I've announced him and insisted to come to Barnsley City hall , because we were living in diferent addreses, he was in London living with his friends, I was and still do live with my family ,we are not married . In the end he accepted . At that moment I didn't realize that I was forcing him but only because he assured me that he wanted to be in that relationship although he was brutal , manipulating me , and I was concidering that love... The signature of that birth certificat was the single time that he camed and seen his child . After that there were no sign of interest and no financial support from him to this child . In the present I don't have a clue about his life and I don't know where he is . Based on the lack of interest and actions I consider him a negative influence on me and my baby , that's why I don't want to exist any connection with him and I want to change the birth certificate. Is there a possibility that you could help me ? Thanks XoX

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Ev - posted on 03/27/2014

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You can go on with life. What I do not understand is you would want to deny your child the chance to know the father? And it is possible the father will return and ask for the right to see his own child. You already have the child with you. But he as rights too. No one said you did not have rights to the child. But you are not listening when I say its very hard to change a Birth Certificate at all. And you have to have proof that the father is a danger to your child. And I am not up on laws in your country but where I live (states) unless there is reasonable doubt about a parent's being around a child because of danger to child, then you just can't write out the other parent.

Simona - posted on 03/27/2014

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From what you'r saing I should whait for him for the day that he might come back and until then I just waist my life and my son's ?...For me that is not an option . I belive that a women haves the equal right as the men and I am looking for advices that can take me to what I want to achieve from other mom's that sadly were or are in my situation.

Ev - posted on 03/27/2014

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That is parent alienation. How do you know that someday he might change his mind and want to be there in the life of his child? And it takes a lot to change the birth certificate and since he is listed as the father I am not sure how easy it would be to get him off of that. Also, you should contact a lawyer and see what the laws say about it. It might be that you can not get him off the birth certificate but I would surely get custody, visitation and child support ordered so if he does show his face again you will be ready for that. You can enact the whole lot of those and once he makes himself known, he will have to be paying his support to his child but at the same time he will have the right to see his child too. I am not sure what the laws in England are but in the States, for the most part if there are court orders and so on they have to be abided by both parents.

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