Jessica - posted on 08/27/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




I am a stepmom. I met my husban a little over three years ago and am so incredibly in love with him i would do anything for him but sometimes being a stepmom goes above and beyond that. I am hated so much by my stepsons mother that she litterally makes every single weekend that my husband and i have together miserable. I think in her eyes i stole him from her because when he was obviously over her she was still trying to salvage whatever she could of the relationship and in her eyes i swooped in and broke up their happy home. Obviously that was not the case being that my husband pursued me for three months before i gave him the time of day, She will not let me pick him up from day care drop him off, make a deciscion on anything, NOTHING! I recently read many posts saying that they agree that waking your child up in the middle of the night to get them used to peeing on the potty them selves is the right thing to do. She is disgusted that my husband and i decided to try this method with out consulting her. If she makes a decision about him she would never ask ny husband or my self what we thought but we apparently have to discuss every parenting technique we choose with her. Now if she were a nice person and my husban and i agreed with her parenting techniques at all we would for sure discuss this with her but she is the most bitter, evil, insensitive, resentful, closeminded, selfish, disrespectful, person and mother we have ever met. I could tell you stories of what she has done that would make your jaw drop and we dont have custody for one big reason... shared custody gives you every other weeked and one day a week and we get him 4 days a week sometimews 5. We dont want to see him less. Right now she is going through another one of her famous moodswings and seeing andrew every other weekend and all week and now giving us only every other weekend when we just had him thurs throught sunday because she says we make decisions without her cause of the waking him up in the night decision we both made. If someone out there tells me why i should wake him up i would like to know. I just want to get him pottie trained he feels so guilty when he pees the bed so we are trying to help he is 4 and a half. she is a horrible human being and i dont know what to do. Dealing with her consumes our lives and i am so glad i found this website because i dont know who else to vent to.


Michelle - posted on 08/27/2012




First of all children of this age do not need to be woken in the night to pee, when his bladder has matured enough he will stay dry through the night. However if he is self conscious about wetting the bed then I would have him wear pampers goodnights until he is dry that way there will be no mess to clean up. He feels guilty about peeing because someone has made his accidents a big deal. What we have done with my daughter is put a portable potty in her room for bedtime and that way if she wakes in the night she gets up and goes pee then goes back to bed but we never actually wake her we have a few odd accidents but I just change the sheets and the pee pad and we move on as if nothing happened. Some children wet the bed until they are 11 and have no control over this. As for how often you see the child if you want to see him more then you have to get a concrete custody agreement that she can't change children need stability not just seeing daddy when their mommy deams it necessary


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Snickerzzz_33 - posted on 08/27/2012




first of all dont feel bad, you're doing the best job you can with ur stepson. I am not a stepmom, but my husbands former wife of 30 years looks at me in the same way she does you. they have been divorced for over 2 years, before I met him. I would try to have a conversation with her and ur husband to settle things once and for all. does his son live with u? or his mom? it sounds like he's living with you and your husband but she makes most of the decisions about your son. I think waking a child up to pee at night is perfect, and I might even try it myself. (she's only 4 months my baby). ask ur son when shes around how he feels about getting up at night to pee? does it relax him makes him feel better? I understand he's 4 yrs. i think that once she hears what her own child feels she might take a step back, if it makes he feel good and motivated. kids that age know how to express themselves. maybe just knowing which step to do first; talking with her alone with ur husband, or with ur child, her and the husband. if the child lives with you, you and ur hub, especially him need to tell her to back off. I bet its harder when the child is not ur own, but ur doing great, so dont feel bad, shes jealous of u.

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