help!!

Jocelyn - posted on 12/11/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I have three kids that are 9,7,and 6. i have been in a relationship with their father for ten yrs and i feel like ive been a single mother the entire time. now im having behavior issues with my two youngest (boys btw). Im at my wits end and theres not one single day that im not physically and emotionally drained. Now because of personal issues we live in separate homes but are still a couple. but now its even worse. the tiny bit of support i did have has diminished and the anger and resentment is being taken out on my kids. i feel so bad all the time because i know its not their fault. i dont know what to do anymore. whats worse is i dont have any family/friend support. ive alienated myself and my kids because of my depression. i dont want my kids to grow up hating me. im just looking for advice. oh yea btw now that we dont live together the financial support that was always available from their father is now almost non existant as well. we get whatever is left from what he hasnt spent on himself. Im a stay at home mom so u can imagine how rough it is trying to raise three kids with almost no financial or emotional support.

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Tor Akil - posted on 12/11/2012

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Relationships are tough sometimes. When they are good they are really good, I mean kids and all kinds of good things come out of it. I feel like my relationships have there ups and downs. Really don't like the downs. But they happen to all of us. You are not alone. Just going through a rough patch. There is power in positive thinking though. And from learning from mistakes and experiences. I got really down on myself in college because I was working 3 jobs and busting my behind--but failing classes left and right. It took me 7 years to get a simple liberal arts degree. Make sure you take care of yourself; eat right, get your rest, and love yourself. Did you know that a lack of vitamins in your diet can cause depression? Get back on the horse, turn over a new leaf. I went through a time when I was poor (when I didn't have 3 kids) and alone for about 7 years when I was in college. Talk about barely getting by. But I have to be honest, I started depending on God and He helped me through all of my troubles. Granted He didn't just lift me out of there, but I got through it. I started reading the bible one day and before I knew it I was getting more and more encouragement from that book. Couldn't understand why people made a big deal about it before until I picked it up. When I looked up and I was sitting my graduation it dawned on me that I had really made it. Seems like you need a plan. Go to God in prayer and ask Him for help. Lay it all out. He knows already but you would be surprise how much your relationship with God will relief tension and stress. I look at prayer as talking to Him. And I talk to him about the little things and the big things that are good and bad in my day. God bless you and I hope I don't weird you out. Just trying to help and know what you are going thru.

Sarah - posted on 12/11/2012

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I'm sorry your going through this! Are you seeing anyone for your depression? I know money is an issue, but a lot of churches offer some kind of services. I would definately get the whole family in to some kind of counseling or group session. Also you need to set up child support through the court. He made those kids too and he has a legal obligation towels pay for them. Good luck!

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